The Games
by girlwiththebooks
Summary: what if prim wasn't picked? what if another girl was? though she doesn't have katniss' fire, Rina-call her Rin-Newfeld has the spark that could lead her to win the 74th hunger games. / NOTE this fic is old and is under reconstruction. it will be radically changed. please don't judge, it is like 3 or more years old. i rewrote the first chapter
1. 1

_an: hi, this is A, and this is my rewrite. trust me it'll be a lot different for the later chapters. i'm just doing this for kicks. i don't own the hunger games, suzanne collins does._

_also, i rated this Teen, but know i use f- and sh-t considerably. please don't make me change this to M because of a few words, because that'll be a pain in the butt._

_review? that'd be great. idk if i'll rewrite later chapters but this'll be fun for now_

* * *

I feel the grass rustle beneath my feet. It startles me so much I throw my knife reflexively. When I pick up the game, I hold a two-foot long snake with a blade coming out of its neck.

"Did you catch a snake?" Terrence smiles. We've been friends for as long as my memories go back. The duo that sneaks under an electric fence to survive stays together, I guess.

I run my fingers over its scales. "I think so…" It's a light brown and smells like rotten eggs, which makes me gag. Tel walks over to examine it.

"We can sell the skin to the peacekeepers, for sure. I'd say we could make a fortune out of it."

"A fortune? From this little worm?"

"Sure, I mean the skin is in layers. You can get a lot out of an even smaller snake."

"Didn't know you were an expert on snakes." I tease him. Before I can push him aside jokingly, a bell rings out. It echoes through the trees. We have one hour until the reaping begins.

"Dammit, we've only got an hour. Better get to the Hob now before we have to be in the square."

"We can always sell after the reaping." I say.

"We should just sell after. Easier to get a good deal when everyone's feeling generous." It hits me that we both take tesserae. This year, I have 20 slips in the bowl, and Tel has 24. Every year, our odds are worse and worse. With two tributes sent off to fight 22 others to the death every year, we haven't had a victor in decades.

I mock our escort, Effie Trinket, who runs District 12's reaping. "May the odds be _ever_ in your favor!"

He laughs. "Happy Hunger Games! I'm off to go watch people die on my satin comforter! Doesn't it sound just grand?"

"Oh yes! I was thinking about adding another pillow! You can never have too many of those!"

We chuckle until our muscles ache. "I'll see you at the reaping." He gives me a squeeze, then walks to the fence.

* * *

My dress for the reaping is mostly white. There's a patch of black that flickers for most of the left side and then tapers around my waist, like a fire erupting onto it. My mother wore it. My sister couldn't fit in it, so she passed it onto me. Livia wears a simple, faded dress for her final reaping. I picked up the tesserae this year so she wouldn't be even more vulnerable.

"You're going to be fine. Milo made it through. I'm going to make it through. You will too." Livia tries to comfort herself as we wait in line for the census.

"Livia, if I do get picked," she tries to protest, but I continue. "If I do get picked, don't volunteer for me. You and I both know I have at least some chance of surviving."

"But you won't get picked. So drop it." She snaps.

At the front, the peacekeeper orders me, "Give me your hand." The prick of the needle stings; he smashes my fingertip onto a paper, then shoves me away. I look for Terrence in the crowd, only to hear him behind me.

"Wow, this party's a real downer."

"I know, we need some music or some food here. Not enough hot peacekeepers to stare at." I grin. He pushes me aside and starts to walk away with a sly smile on his face, but he turns back.

"Get over here." He pulls me into a hug. "Meet me afterwards, okay?" I nod into his chest and clutch him tightly. Tel may be the only certainty in my world and I don't want to let him go.

Two peacekeepers rip us apart, one shoving me towards my section. I take my place next to a few girls I know from school and simply wait for the reaping to start.

A gong rings twice, echoing through the square. Everyone hushes to the point that the only sound left is Effie's shoes as she walks onstage. Her hair is bright pink and she wears a fuschia dress which only emphasizes her ghastly white face.

Her teeth are bleached white. I can see them from here as she smiles into the microphone. "Happy Hunger Games!" Her Capitol accent is thick, making her vowels droop lower and her mouth open wider. "May the odds be ever in your favor!" She squeals with delight.

The crowd is silent. "Let's welcome District 12's, ah, only victor...Mr. Haymitch Abernathy." She applauds, as does a few others scattered in the crowd. He stumbles on stage in a drunken mess, and nearly topples her over as she attempts to help her up.

He grabs the microphone. "Hey! You!" He points to a boy in the middle as he slurs his words together. "Try not to get picked. If you do, you're fucked! I can't do anything about it!" He chuckles his way over to his seat and falls face first into it. Effie looks like she's sick.

"Always charming, Mr. Abernathy. Now, this year, there is a film from the Capitol for you all. Let's watch."

It turns out to be a shortened film version of the Treaty of Treason. Effie looks emotionally invested in it. It's ridiculous and horribly put together. I roll my eyes when they show a row of happy district people joining in hands. Propaganda. It's all just propaganda bullshit.

"Wasn't that spectacular? Effie says. "I just love that. Well, it's time to start the reaping." She sounds like an excited schoolgirl. "First up, girls."

She walks over to the fishbowl of names, swirling her hand around the slips. My heart rate rises sharply until I feel it beating wide and fast. She grabs a slip and walks over to read it. After carefully opening it, she clears her throat and the entire district is wordless.

"Rina Newfeld"

Dammit. Dammit. I curse and feel my senses sharpen as panic sets in. I start to walk and find myself running. Before I can look back, peacekeepers push me forward and I slip down. I catch my balance before I fall in front of the entire country and walk onstage.

The sun is at its peak.I can see it from my spot onstage, standing beside the glass bowl that holds the names of every girl in District 12. It's just my luck it was my slip she grabbed. My mouth has gone dry. I don't even notice it until I go to swallow and find nothing but emptiness.

I feel my body tremble, my hands shake. Effie makes her way to the glass of the male names. She sticks her hand almost eagerly into the wave of paper and comes up with a slip.

"Rory Hawthor-"

She can barely finish the name before a voice yells. "I VOLUNTEER!" I know that voice.

I wish I didn't.

I want to scream at him to take it back, to walk back and pretend he said nothing. But he keeps walking and I stare him down, hoping he'll get my message.

"What a courageous young man! What's your name?"

"Terrence Nero." His voice cracks at the end. I haven't heard his voice crack for years.

"Well, Terrence-and Rina-we wish you luck." She smiles deviously. "May the odds be ever in your favor." The reaping is over. I take one last look at the people I know, the people I'll be leaving, just before Effie pushes us into the Justice Building. Once inside, we each get a room to ourselves to say goodbye.

There's only one person I need to talk to and he's across the hall.


	2. please don't read past here pls

2

Gasps came from everywhere. I stood, frozen, listening to people say in amazement "How on earth could he volunteer?" "Doesn't he know that he'll have to watch his best friend die?" My eyes try to meet Tsubasa's, but I just can't do it. I watch him run up onto the stage. I stare down at my hand, and he grabs it, warming me; but I honestly doubt he knows the trouble he's just created for us. Scanning the crowd, I have to hold back a scream.

Livia has watched this all, next to my mother.

"Let's give our tribute and volunteer tribute a round of applause!" Effie Trinket yells. Silence ensues; people are shocked that we're going to watch our deaths even though we are our only companion to each other. They then press three fingers to their lips and hold them hand out at us.

This is extremely sweet of the people in District 12. What they just did was show that we will be missed terribly, or at least they think we will. I know the people in the village loved hearing me play the violin around town, and I know Tsubasa was liked around the District.

Then we're forced to listen to the Treaty of Treason. It's a long speech given every year, but now I can barely hear it. My thoughts are a mess and I just can't believe that out of all the girls, I got picked for the female tribute. I mean sure I had extra to make up for Livia's seven lost, but that shouldn't have to compare to the other girls who have over 50 slips in there…shouldn't it? Even worse, now I'll have to go either die in front of my best friend or watch his death because he volunteered. That's what is irritating me most. There has to be another reason he volunteered. There is no way he just volunteered because he couldn't watch his friend die without being there. On reaping days, friendships only go so far, and family love is at a minimum. I can only imagine he thinks that if we both go there's a good chance on of us will come out, which actually might be true, but still, one of us has to die if we want to have a winner between the two of us. I only can hope that, because usually the winner is from Districts 1, 2, or 4, where they've been trained their whole lives for this.

I stop gripping his hand. I just think that it's kind of unnecessary. I wait and wait, hoping that I'll think of something good that came out of this. Nope, I can think of nothing. I sigh, and I get some pitied looks at me. I smile gratefully to the crowd, because at least they don't want me to die. I see some of my classmates in the crowd-Madge, the mayor's daughter, Peeta Mellark, the baker's son, Katniss Everdeen, the daughter of the local healer we take Livia to, and more.

Then I'm reminded of a horrid truth-I'll probably be in the games during my 16th birthday. That is, if I'm alive by then. That in and of itself, is gruesome. Having to be in a bloody battle during one of your special days? How bad can this get? I'm sure someone else has noticed this. Maybe I'll get a sponsor to give me a birthday cake while I'm fighting. Heh.

When it ends, we're shoved into the Justice Building to a white room. I go into the door on the right and Tsubasa to the left. Then after a few minutes of waiting in silent meditation on what's to come, Effie comes in, puts her arm around my shoulder and assures "Honey, everything will be alright. Now some people have come to say goodbye to you. Just tell me when you're ready."

_Well, at least she isn't a complete idiot._ "I'm ready." I promise.

Gingerly, she closes the door. Then after a few seconds, Tsubasa's parents come in. His mother looks indifferent. His father just looks determined. Determined to do what?

His mother speaks before I can apologize for what Tsubasa did. "He's such a fool, that boy. Never thinks of the effects of his actions. Worthless child" Sure, she may not like him, but this is appalling. Her own son might die, and she doesn't care. At loss for words, I say nothing. I would love to kill this woman any second now.

Effie comes in to escort her out. After the door closes, Tsubasa's father begins to verbalize "She might not get him, but I clearly understand Tsubasa and why he's doing this."

"Because I'm his friend?"

"Sure. But on to other matters. Keep him alive. Keep yourself alive. Find some way to come home together. I know for a fact you can survive, outlast, and outsmart the others. The only problem is convincing the capitol to keep you both alive and announce you both winners." He declares. "Well, stay alive and good luck."

He leaves, and there's a moment of stillness for me to analyze what he just said. Outsmarting the others is something I can do? It dawns on me just as the door opens and none other than Ms. Everdeen and her daughters come in. I just know they're going to tell me that Livia will be okay; but she won't. Sleepless nights for her will be common now that I'm gone. It's unbearable to think how that one slip of paper with my name that just happened to get picked will affect her.

I notice that her daughter Katniss is with her. Katniss is around my age, and completely fearless. She's a master at the bow and arrow, like her friend Gale. Her bravery has gotten her to end up hunting in forbidden forests just because her family needs food. She's also very comely, and it always seemed like Tsubasa had a crush on her. Her blackish-brown hair is in its single braid like it always is, but she's wearing a blue dress that compliments her perfectly.

Her little sister Prim, who looks nothing like her, with her blond hair and blue eyes, starts to whimper watching me and knowing that I'm going to die soon. "I promise mom and I will keep your sister Livia safe!" she blubbers. I feel terrible, knowing that this girl has to go through this. I pat her head and thank her for working so hard for me.

Katniss adds "Also, since you were a hard worker for your family, if they run low on food, Gale and I will give the portion of our kill when we hunt."

"You don't have to…" I stutter.

She smiles, reminding me of why she is in eternal debt to me.

They walk out, and then the moment I wished would never have to come happens. Livia comes in, and the tears are just drenching her face. I can't stand to watch it. It's painful. She wails "You have to win! Otherwise, I can't go on in life without you." Despite how it seems immature, I know it's just Livia wishing for our time to be eternally happy. For things to go the same way forever, that's her dream all right. I wish that too, but I know there has to be conflict for a life to be enjoyable.

I kiss her forehead "I'll try my best." Wiping her tears away with my hand, I feel like the older sister now. Then Effie comes to usher her out, and that's when the tears start rolling down my cheeks. My parents come in, sobbing as well, wishing me luck, and my dad winks at me, and I hug them for what was probably five minutes, but felt like three seconds.

Then, Tsubasa and I were shoved on a luxury train headed in one direction-to the capitol. I finally looked in the eyes of the boy I met in 1st grade. I remember being the first one to like his name. Tsubasa the boy who has mastered the sword, the one who's name was what made him an outcast to the other boys. I don't think I'll be able to watch him die. Actually, I'm sure that if I win, the memories will be too painful.

We go into a dining car to have the most extravagant meal of my life. Rolls, salads, a thick stew, and ice cream for dessert. Afterwards, Effie shows us our rooms. Then, when she runs off, I lie on my bed, and sob. I cry for hours, but then again my sense of time is distorted. Then, I remember-my violin. I never got to play my violin one last time before I die. This just reignites blubbering because my violin is a huge part of my life. I was the best violinist in District 12, and I hoped to become famous someday.

When Effie calls for dinner, I don't respond. I simply wait for the tears on my face to fall. Then Tsubasa comes in. He doesn't say anything at all; he knows that nothing will help me now. We've lost everything but each other, and even now we'll have to lose each other. He then places his hand on my face. It's so comforting in a time like this. I surprisingly have never felt his hand on my face. It's warm-especially against my cold skin. I wish I could stay here, like this, forever. No arena to go to, no blood to be shed, no death, nothing. Just our happy friendship.

Then Haymitch bursts down the door, booze in hand. "Sorry, but you two will be coached separately. So don't count on seeing him much at all, Aelius"

"My name is RIN. Aelius, while it is a cool name, it's my middle name, and it's a male name." I say sternly.

"Whatever you say sweetheart." He assures.

"Why are you coaching us separately?" Tsubasa shouts.

"Friendship shows weakness. You know only on person's coming out of the games." Haymitch's voice rises. "Allies are okay, but friendships are a fantasy in the games! Use your head for once! You know you're just going to get depressed at the other's death and you won't be able to go on! So suck it up, and get over yourselves!" He screams at us. "And that's an order!"

"Okay, but…" Tsubasa starts to speak when Haymitch drags him out.

Now it dawns on me. When I go into the arena, I will be alone.


	3. why are you still reading

3

I pound on the door, screaming and wailing for him to come back. Stupid soundproof walls. Every so often, I have to breathe or I'll run out of air. After a long time of my screeching, I pass out from lack of air, and I don't regain consciousness until the morning.

The light is slightly coming in my small window, and the air is cool. I breathe in and it smells of cleaning products. If a maid came in without me knowing…I will kill whoever's in charge. I soak in pure, unaltered, silence. It's a very calm feeling. I almost fall back asleep, but then Effie slams the door open and squeals "It's another big, big, big day!"

_Shut up Effie_ I think. "Thanks so much for waking me!" I say, hoping she won't pick up how utterly irritated I am at her. I throw a fake smile her way, and she says "Breakfast in ten! I've got big, big, big news!" Is everything _big, big, big _with her? Then she promptly closes the door. I dress in the white shirt, jeans, and shoes of a plain variety that were laid out for me. I see they've provided a closet for me to hang up my reaping dress. It's helpful, but sort of sad to hang it up. I walk through the train cars to go have breakfast. First, it's a lounge car with no one occupying it, then a kitchen car with a path through it marked by glass walls. Finally, I reach the dining room car. I was expecting maybe some bread, butter, fruit, eggs was a possibility, but what I come to is a fête for a breakfast, with every kind of food you could imagine to have for breakfast. I don't know what to eat, so I take a few rolls, some butter, and hot cocoa, and I go to eat, to see if my stomach can even process this food.  
My now least favorite person in the whole world is sitting in front of me. How wonderful. Speaking of Haymitch, he's passing out about every five minutes, because he probably drank as much as anyone could in one night without dying. It still boggles my mind how he's still alive and lives like this. Then I see Effie's right next to him, bantering about whatever the heck she feels like. So far I hear about night time and how we'll love the capitol when we get there. Sure, Effie. Keep living in your fantasy world. I have to think that she's just nervous around us and wants us to be happy, but I could be wrong. She always seems to hide any negative emotion with a ditzy happiness. I hate to say this, but I respect Haymitch more than her for that reason. He at least embraces reality and accepts it. She just makes up a desirable world for us and expects us to love her for it.

Then I see Tsubasa, right next to me. I mouth to him _"Everything okay?"_ He looks startled, but then, he nods and smiles. He silently asks back _"You okay too?"_ I toss my head around and shrug my shoulders, to give the impression that life is okay, not that great though. He squeezes my hand to tell me that everything will be okay. But I know that's not true. We're going to the capitol as tributes of the least wealthy district. I don't think any of the odds are in our favor. Maybe I'll go and everyone will love me for me and I'll get tons of sponsors. But what are the chances of that? Slim; because usually by the time the interviews come around people already have their preference, so unless I get some amazing training score, the chances of me getting sponsors are pretty low. I know I won't get a wonderful training score, because unless I do something amazing, knives can only go so far for the gamemakers. I go to get an actual breakfast besides the bread I've been snacking on, but I find from all the stress I'm under, rolls and butter sound the most appetizing. I go back to the table, and nibble on the bread while I sarcastically enjoy life.

A lot of people look at me and think I'm a perfectionist person. I always have to be astonishingly good or I'm nothing. Here, that goes double, because I won't be anything special. So I beat myself up about things I'm not good at. It's not that I want to, it just happens. And I will never in a thousand years tell people I'm good at something, because in my book that makes me a narcissist, and narcissists are my pet peeve. I'm probably going to find some in the arena though, and if they pick a fight with me, then I'll actually try to kill someone.

Finally, Effie says something worth my time "and GUESS WHAT?" She yells. "Tonight you'll be sleeping in the capitol after the parade! Isn't that exciting?"

We both mumble sarcastic remarks of "Yippie. I'm overjoyed," and relating annotations when Effie says to go pack our stuff up. I laugh inside my head. What stuff do we even have? Really, I only have my token, and reaping dress and that's about it.

"Hey Rin," Tsubasa says as we walk through the train cars. "What did you bring as your token?" I look at him, and he realizes the minute I show him my necklace. It's very plain when it comes to jewelry, but I absolutely love it. It's just a silver chain with a diamond charm in the middle. Tsubasa recognizes it immediately because he gave it to me, on my 13th birthday, six years after we had first become friends. I have such fond memories of when he got it for me. He saved money for a year to by it at the only jewelry store in District 12. To do so, he became a worker at a local shop in the marketplace, and to keep it a surprise, he told me he was saving for a new and better sword. When I received it, I was so overjoyed. It's the only piece of jewelry I have to call my own. So I kept remembering his hard work, and on his 15th birthday, I bought him-

"My token is the pocket watch." He replied.

Exactly. I bought, with the money I get playing my violin on the strees, a gold pocket watch. It took many, many months, and I ended up with just enough money.

"Really?" I say. My eyes well up with tears, but I fight them off, remembering that every place could have a camera. "Just…Just go. Haymitch will literally murder you if he finds you." I murmur.

He turns away and runs through the train car to the exit. He must think I rejected him as a friend. Crap. Why am I such an idiot? God, these are the times when I think I deserve the arena. I deserve death. A very painful one.

The train stops. I'm holding my belongings as the door opens. Then, when I least expect it, attendants rush me inside the capitol and up glass elevators. They go so fast I barely have enough time to realize what's going on. When the elevator stops, I'm shoved into a huge room, where I am seated in front of a mirror. The assistants leave, and I am shrouded in silence, all alone.

"Welcome, girl of white."

Note-If you think necessary I might blend chapters 2&3 together since 3 is so short. Feedback?


	4. how are you understanding this

4

I flinch, as a guy with brown hair, blue eyes, and wearing a black shirt and nice pants. He looks around 20, younger if anything. His expression is warm and I can tell I'll like him. Especially since he's the only person I've met concerning the games that isn't a freak-physically or mentally. He winks, telling me he knows I'm deep in thought.

"I'll introduce myself after they fix you up." he says. As he walks out, three people who look a little mutant walk in. One has green skin, is sort of plump, while one has aqua hair and gold tattoos. The last one, the only guy of the three has purple lipstick on and corkscrew curls that are a bright shade of orange.

They shove me in front of a mirror and try to strip me of my clothes when I smack the orange one in the face and demand "Who the hell are you? And what right do you have to be making me naked?" I want to keep screaming but the aqua one hushes me.

"Darling, we're your prep team! My name is Venia, he's Flavius, and over there, she's Octavia. We're here to make sure you look dashing, so that your stylist will turn you into something special." She says in a thick Capitol accent, as she takes off my pants. Octavia shrieks when she sees my nails, but Venia's eyes though light up when she sees my body. Flavius strokes my hair, and he looks like he's evaluating it.

"You remarkably don't have much leg hair" Venia ways as she gets these strips of adherent paper ready to shave my legs.

"What in the world…do you bite your nails?" Octavia questions me.

"Eh? Er-yeah…sorry." I say apologetically.

"Your hair…it's beautiful…just gorgeous…" Flavius gasps "And who did your side bangs?"

"Uh…I guess I did them with my knife…" I blush. I'm no good at talking about beauty and makeup. I've never been into that kind of stuff.

They banter about anything and everything from colors to the food served here. They ask about District 12, and then Octavia asks rather slyfully "So, what's going on with you and your fellow tribute…Tsubasa is his name…right? Why did he volunteer to go with you?"

"Well…we're best friends. We met when we were seven or so. Now, don't ask me why he volunteered. I'm still trying to figure that out. I mean, as smart as he is, he was dumb enough to volunteer to go with me. Doesn't he know that he is going to have to watch me die?" I sigh "It just doesn't make sense. Well, he has more of a chance of surviving then I do, so I hope you'll enjoy me while I'm alive."

Then I wonder-how does my prep team here keep talking all happily? How does anyone related to the tributes keep being all joyful when they talk and act? Isn't there someone here that gets it? Understands that 23 of us aren't coming back? Thinking about our deaths may be dreadful but let's stop beating around the bush and look fear in the eye for once.

I see Venia's tearing up. I feel bad fur putting it in front of their innocent minds the real truth. "So how is the dehairing coming along?" I say nervously, trying desperately to change the subject.

"Oh!" Venia exclaims as she goes back to her peppy state. "Coming very well, we're almost done! You must have taken great care of yourself."

"Except for your nails." Octavia says coldly. Everyone on the team laughs, and I call out "You're never going to forgive me for that, aren't you?"

After a while, they all say in unison "Done!" and I'm left to look at my body.

I look (for once) beautiful. I have a spotless, bare body. My skin color comes out easily, now that all the hair on my legs is gone. I stick my right hand out to find that my nails were scrubbed clean and the tips painted white. Then I glance at my hair. It's almost exactly the same as it was the hour before we started, just shinier and silkier. Then I notice all my scars are concealed. I have been made a perfect human.

"We hope you enjoy the way you look." The prep team cooes. They pace out and I am left alone, engulfed in stillness.

Then, that same guy from earlier comes back in. "Hello. I see they did a good job on you. But I'm glad they didn't do much to your overall image. You already looked gorgeous." He says.

"You don't have to fake compliment me. I know for a fact I am **not** pretty. Not in the least." I interrupt.

"You keep on thinking that." He says with a smile. "My name's Cinna. I'm your stylist."

Oh yeah. The stylists. They're so caked in makeup and surgically enhanced it's almost freakish. The stylists usually stay in the same district and style for their whole lives. Few decide to retire. I've seen some of the stylists my whole life. I know for a fact this is his first year, because we always see our district stylist, and I've never seen him before. I hope he's better than the others.

The opening ceremonies are when the stylists get to show off their talent, while they also need to show what the district is there for. Since 12 is the coal mining district, our tributes are usually in tacky miner outfits. One year a stylist went a little crazy and had the tributes stark naked and covered in black powder to represent coal. It was horrid to watch. I can only hope we might not have to go that far.

Cinna walks around my body, and he seems to like it, but personally, I don't. I hate my legs. Standing, they look fine, but when I sit, they look sort of fat. I know in the arena they'll get much smaller, but still, I don't like them.

"Go get dressed in this and then we'll talk" He says, as he gives me a white shirt and blue jeans.

After dressing, I meet Cinna in a room that is all glass, and it overlooks the Capitol. I see it's about lunchtime. Cinna has a salmon platter awaiting me. It has the fish, a bowl of rice, and a mixture of bamboo shoots, green beans, carrots, celery, and water chestnuts all in a sweet sauce. Cinna has almost the same, but different sauce and vegetables. One taste and I know this is the final word in fine dining.

"So, Rin, can I ask you a few questions?" Cinna requests.

"Sure. I'd love to talk to you about whatever you need." I say sincerely.

"Why do tons of people call you Aelius when they first meet you? And why does it always say 'Rin Aelius' whenever your name is listed?" He asks.

I sigh. "Aelius is my middle name. I think it's pretty cool, but I'd much rather have people call me by my first name. The capitol doesn't think Rin is a "legitimate" name, so they call me by my middle name. If you see them write 'Rin Aelius' somewhere, please ask them to change it to just 'Rin'." I explain

"Okay. Question number two: If you had to describe yourself in colors what would you say?" He inquires.

"That's an odd one. Well, probably white and black are the colors that best describe me." I answer.

"Do you like those colors?" He questions.

"Yeah. I love those colors. I like white more then black, but when you describe me, they're kind of equal." I reply.

"Cool. Now, onto other matters, like your outfit for the parade." Cinna suggests, as he puts down the cup of tea he was drinking. "I want you to remember the reaping. It may be painful but how about this? Remember what you were wearing."

I picture my dress from the reaping. Magnificent, but the memory is painful. I don't understand why he wants me to remember the dress.

"You were white with a bit of complimentary black. Your friend who volunteered was just the opposite-black with a bit of white. Now here's my idea-coal is black, and energy is like light or white, right? So I propose we give the audience the friends from the reaping, but we give the Capitol coal and energy. You'll be unforgettable." He says energetically.

"Uh…Cinna? One problem. Haymitch wants us to look as enemies so that sponsors will be all over us choosing sides and teams and what not. Neither of us wants to do that, but we have to follow Haymitch's orders." I explain.

"Rin, answer me honestly, what is Tsubasa to you? That's my last question" Cinna asks.

"That's a hard one…He's kind of like a partner…in a friend way." I say very earnestly.

"That's interesting. Because before you came, Portia and I were talking about how Tsubasa volunteered to come with you, and what the meaning behind it was. Love? Simply friendship? So trying to convince the audience that you hate each other with is a difficult task. I now think that he did it because of friendship, and that is just amazing. I can now tell there is nothing between you two, but don't be afraid of there being something. Am I making sense?" He says sincerely. I nod. He's making perfect sense.

To break the akward silence I ask "Can I see my dress?"

Cinna grins and takes me in front of the mirror. He slips a white gossamer-like dress on me. The dress is beautiful, but still rebellious. At the hem placed at my knees, it's ripped to show a bit more of what I'll look like in the arena. The dress is sleeveless, but he slips on fingerless gloves that start at the top part of my elbow and end at my middle knuckle on each of my finger. The gloves are black, as if it's the coal, and my dress is the energy coming from the coal. Then, I step into some silver boots that start right under my knees. The heels are black too, for the same reason as the gloves. Once I'm done with putting my clothes on, Cinna smiles, and when I glance at him, he points at the mirror.

"You're quite dazzling, girl of white." He tells me.

I'm shocked at my transformation, but I then I utter "Yes…and it's all because of you. Thank you Cinna." I'm startled at first when he hugs me, but Cinna is like a father-no, more like an older brother to me. His warmth just makes me grin. Out of all the people I've net so far, he's the best the Capitol has to offer.

But then Cinna says, "And you'll be electrifying on the chariot-I'm not being metaphorical here."

Before I have time to ask him what he means, he presses a button, and there's Portia and Tsubasa. Tsubasa's wearing a black tunic-y like shirt, and shorts, but to make up for the shorts, he has piece of gray fabric-I wouldn't call them legwarmers- covering his shins that smoothly transfer into his black shoes that are like gym shoes. He's got a glove like mine, but white, and instead of a pair, he's only got one. He's definitely getting us sponsors.

When he sees me, he just beams at me, and holds up his hand. I high five it in return, and say "You've got one awesome parade costume."

"So do you" He says.

Portia sighs. "You two are such good friends. It's so sad that Haymitch is planning for you to kill each other in the arena."


	5. out here be monsters

**Okay, since you've waited toooooooooo long, I'll just put the crappy gramatically incorrect chapter and let you read it. This chapter is REALLY important, as it introduces the last main-ish character. So enjoy.**

**If you didn't notice, I'm redoing the beginning chapters, and I've uploaded a new chapter 1. Go read it. It's a billion times better.**

**Also, a shout out to isabugg. you guys need to go read her fanfictions, NOW. I DON'T CARE GO READ THEM.  
**

5

Tsubasa yells "What? NO! Just no!" My face flushes. Haymitch must be planning something with the gamemakers. If he's doing that then…there's no way they won't go through with it. They all love a good fight. Nonononono. This can't be happening. I feel my pulse speeding up. I try to stay composed, but it's no use. I'm pale and nervous. Then, I faint, as Cinna and Tsubasa try to save me.

* * *

I awake to be in Cinna's arms. The atmosphere is different than the sleek, glassy place I though I was at. I notice that we're in some kind of stable. Isn't the opening parade supposed to start soon? The parade! I jerk awake and Cinna is surprisingly unflinching.

"Phew. What a relief, you're awake. Go on top of the chariot, if you can." Cinna says, calmed. I'm still awake and alive. I hop onto the chariot, and when Haymitch walks off for a moment, Tsubasa pulls me into an embrace.

"Don't scare me like that," He says, worriedly. Seeing Haymitch walking back in, he pushes me away.

"Oh, sweetheart, I see you're living." Haymitch sneers. Effie trots in after him, and you can see utter joy come across her face.

"You two look absolutely DARLING! Just as handsome and beautiful as the day of the reaping!" Effie blabbers.

Cinna comes over and puts a transparent sheet-that exactly matches up with my dress and gloves-on me. I feel a miniature bump on my back from the plastic. Then, Cinna presses a button on my back, and my whole dress lights up-like the electricity the capitol gets from coal. We only get fire in our district, but they have factories that can turn coal into electricity. The bump on my back must be a small source of power, or something to transmit power. Cinna has made me something more exhilarating than any other stylist has ever. Tsubasa though, didn't need his help-he's already got better looks than the majority of the tributes. I needed it because I'm not exactly attractive. But here, now, we are the most exciting tributes in the parade.

Claudius Templesmith, the announcer for the games, booms over the speakers "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the 74th Hunger Games! I present to you the tributes of this year!"

The crowd goes wild. Absolutely outrageous. Then, the District 1 tributes go out. The boy is dressed in a copper and gold gladiator outfit, and the lights only seem to shine and reflect his costume. But the girl is dressed in a tacky gold goddess dress. You can easily tell that her stylist thought she had natural good looks.

The districts roll on, until one catches my eye-the tributes of the scientific research District 6 have an interesting theme. Sciences are what move our nation along to progress, so they have the male dressed as the Roman god Apollo, I believe. Since Apollo was the god of medicine, science, and a lot of other things, it works perfect that the girl is in a lab coat, and seems to be taking measurements and mixing chemicals. But the boy specifically catches my eye. His bronze hair, deep blue eyes, and fair skin-he's not exactly Apollo, but he could be. He looks skilled with the bow and arrows, because he shoots them perfectly. His smile is radiant as he shoots one into the air. A few seconds later, it lands exactly in front of him. The crowd goes wild. Looking at the program, I see the boy's name is Sirix. He smiles again at the audience, and all the girls either sigh or squeal. He probably has sponsors from here and anywhere now.

Then 7, 8, 9, 10, and 11 go by. It's our time now. Cinna motions slightly for us to hold hands. Then the horses start. They're so well trained that no one needs to guide them. I soak in the light, the multitude of people, and the noise. Everything falls silent, while they marvel at my electricity and admire Tsubasa's good looks. Our outfits, our bodies, everything is being analyzed by them. Then, they start screaming our names, "Rin!", or chanting "District 12! District 12!" I try to acknowledge the fans in the directions I hear them from, and even more people scream.

Then, a fangirl **(author here: teeheee fangirls make me smile)** screams "Tsubasa! I love you!" He looks at me, then at the audience, and then blushes. Squeals come from every direction. Every camera is on us at this moment. I wave and smile. After that, I look at Tsubasa and notice that he's perfect at this. Every so often he'll wink or something to get the girls all wound up. I honestly doubt that any boy here sincerely likes me. Well, if I die unsponsored in the arena, I'll know why.

We then approach the city circle, right in front of the president's mansion. President Snow is a man with eyes like a snake, hair like ice, and puffy lips. He's a terror to me. I don't care if he rules our country. He's frightening.

As he gives a speech, I examine the tributes. I see few suitable for allies. Tsubasa is an almost guaranteed one, but that Sirix boy seems okay too. We'll have to see what happens in training. When I go to look at him though, it seems he was already gazing at me. When our eyes meet, he quickly looks away. Weird.

Then, once the address from the president is over, the cameraman shows each district again. He shows 12 for the longest by far, and many of the tributes seem irritated at us stealing the spotlight.

We ride back and into the basement of the training center. Cinna, Portia, Haymitch, and Effie are there to greet us.

Effie screams "Oh, you two were just DARLING! I've made deals with sponsors from all over Panem. Everyone loves the energy and coal from 12-or should I say the girl of white and the boy of black!"

I bet you money that Haymitch wasn't even conscious during it, because all he says is "Great job sweetheart" with a smirk.

Cinna gives me a thumbs up, which causes me to grin. He's the main reason for my popularity. Then, we go to an elevator to the actual training center. It's the place we live until the games actually start. Our rooms-or should I say, palaces- dining room, and sitting area for our district is on floor 12. It's our floor because it's our district number.

The elevator is amazing. Crystal and glass walls make it like you're hovering, watching everyone as you fly up to your floor. The elevator is ovular and medium sized, so about 7 people could fit in one if you squish-but then again, there are many, many elevators for use. I'm in this one with Cinna and Tsubasa.

"Nice job there," Tsubasa says. "I'm sure we've got sponsors."

"You're the one who got them for us." I reply. "Especially because you have all those fan girls. I don't even have a fan boy." I add deviously.

"Jealous much?" he adds, obviously making a joke.

"Oh. You _know_ I am." I add sarcastically.

Cinna laughes, amused at our antics between the two of us.

We get to our floor and find that Effie got there before us. She's in the sitting room. "There you are! It's time for dinner. Haymitch and Portia have been waiting. Come with me!" Effie blabbers. She trots in her 8 centimeter high heels, and let me tell you-that is a skill-one that I have not mastered.

When we get to the dining room, a feast is out for us. Rolls of every kind, salad or every variety, and in front of Haymitch is the main course-a darkened meat, most likely from district 10 on one side, and white fish from District 4, I think it's called Tilapia, on the other. Subsequently, I notice that they made our meal black and white too. Cute. Then, next to the platter is a huge bowl of wild rice. My mouth salivates faster than ever before. I fill my side bowl with Greek salad, and bring a bread bowl to my left. Next, I fill my plated with wild rice and the fish. A server comes by and brings a bowl of vegetable soup, and I start if by breaking pieces of the bread and dipping it in my soup. "Thank you" I tell the server graciously. She silently nods, and walks out.

I notice that in the background, Effie has been babbling this whole time and I've just tuned her out. Oh well. She probably was talking about something stupid. I turn to Tsubasa and see that he's just as bored. I finish the delicious, delectable meal, and then I go fill my salad bowl again.

An attendant comes and refills my water. When we're all done, a huge three tier cake is wheeled in. On one side its coal black with sparklers stuck into it, and on the other it's white, and then I realize the black design came from my reaping dress. They cut a piece for me, and I also observe that the cake is swirled chocolate and white cake batter and the filling is checkered. To top it all off, the cake is luscious and scrumptious. One taste and I'm in heaven. I eat, and eat, and eat. I think I must have stuffed down three pieces. I don't remember ever having dessert like this. "Thank you for the wonderful meal." I say courteously.

After dinner we go to watch the recap of the opening ceremonies in the sitting room. I'm not really paying any attention at all, because I'm trying to strategize. It is going to be tricky, having allies, when there's very few I can trust. When we come on, everyone in the room goes crazy. They squeal and yell for us as we ride along. The camera is pinned to us. They show Tsubasa's blush from the fan girl, and at that moment, everyone's eyes dart to him, and he just shrugs his shoulders. "At least we got sponsors for it." He says as he grins at me.

We don't pay attention to the speech from Snow, because everyone is in frenzy with ideas of what our angles should be. My feelings are too jumbled, my brain is in a mess, and I feel like I'm floating. I ask "Can I go rest while you discuss? I'm worn out from the day."

"I am too." My fellow tribute adds.,

Haymitch sighs. Then he sort of smiles as he says "Sure sweetheart. You too."

_Thank you Haymitch_. I run out with Tsubasa and once we're out of sight, he grabs my hand and almost drags me to an elevator. "Where-where are we going?" I ask.

"We're going to the top deck. Portia showed me. The wind's loud so no one can hear us. I've been dying to…er…talk to you. No cameras or Haymitch. Just us." He answers.

We shoot up to an outdoor level where the stars sparkle against the night sky, and indeed, the wind is loud. My pulse goes up at the sight of his smile, his costume, him, everything. What am I thinking? There has never been anything romantic between us. I must have not been lying when I said I was tired. Anyways, he leads me to this garden where the music is the sound of wind chimes and birds, and surrounding it is a section of smaller trees. At first, we sit far away, awkwardly, but then, he pulls me right next to him, with my hands on his chest, like the time when we were stuck in a tree for a night together.

It was a while ago, when we were 13, I believe. It was one of the three times we actually went into the forbidden forest past the fence. There wasn't much of a food source that day, so we decided we would quickly go in there, and if we didn't find prey in an hour, we'd leave. Well, we found prey-too much of it. A pack of wolves surrounded a tree we had managed to climb in the nick of time-and they didn't seem like they were going to leave soon. So, since there wasn't much of a place to lay on, Tsubasa pulled me over and held me the same way as we both fell asleep for the night, after hours of trying to think of an escape plan. We woke up the next morning nestled right up to each other, but we were too immature to think anything of it. So, when we finally escaped, I didn't really think about it. Now, the memories are inundating my head.

I put my feet to the side, and watch the tulips, daisies, and roses as the breeze comes by. Roses, roses, everywhere. Every color, every size- the other flowers are forgotten amongst the beauty. There's a pond at the end of a shimmering stream, and in everything here, there's a lush glimmer to everything. Tsubasa smiles at me, and then he looks away, and gets this sort of irritated look on his face. "Why?" he asks, and I infer he meant to be talking to me.

"Why…is Haymitch so bent about us being apart?" He poses.

I ponder the answer to the question for a moment. He is not going to change his mind, I know. From the start, he was very angry when he first ordered it. Could he have a secret he's hiding from us? Then it hits me.

"He had a love in the arena and doesn't want us to go in as friends because if one of us wins it will be painful like how it is for him." We say in almost perfect unison. I then understand it all. "That explains his alcoholism! He must have tried to use alcohol to forget about whatever was haunting him from his friend and ended up being addicted to it!"

"I'd rather have a painful death as your friend than stay living without you, knowing that you died while we were feigning to hate each other." Tsubasa states firmly, as if Haymitch was watching us.

"Me too." I say, "I could never truly hate you, no matter what."

He sighs in relief, and then presses his lips to my forehead. "And I will always be grateful for that." He tells me. At first, I feel warm and gleeful. But for an instant, that boy, Sirix, flashes in my mind. I remember his blue eyes on mine as we were on the chariots. I quickly dismiss the thought, trying to savor the moments I have now with Tsubasa.

For a while, we sit here, soak in each other's auras, and listen to the birds sing. I see something very unusual. A mockingjay flies from outside the balcony onto a nearby tree.

"Sing it something." Tsubasa requests.

So I do. I sing a simple tune I heard fragments of once in my childhood. It was an old tune that used to be from a quartet by the name of the country that was once here. I can't put my finger on the name though. But the mockingjay listens, and soon is repeating it melodiously. After a while, it finishes, and seeing as there might have been Capitol people around here, it flies away into the distance

We walk back to our rooms on floor twelve, say goodnight, and get in bed. Falling asleep is troublesome. I just can't at the moment. So, I request music. The servant I asked looked confused, but then, in less than a minute, she knows what I mean, and she runs off. In a few seconds, nocturnes for the piano are softly playing in my room. I graciously smile at the girl who did it and give her a thumbs-up. She smiles, and scampers off, out of my room. I go back into bed and the beautiful melodies lull me to sleep.

I wake up to a clear day. No clouds-just blue sky. I get out of bed, undress, and shower. When I do, it's amazing. There are hundreds of buttons, some for water temperature, some for shampoos, scents, soaps, and everything. Once I'm finished, I walk through a panel of driers to towel down my body. The best part is the box. With this specific box, I place my hand on it, and it releases an electrical current, and when it goes through my body, it dries, untangles, and brushes my hair. It looks marvelous when I'm done washing.

I dress in a white undershirt, jeans, and a very warm and soft sweatshirt in a forest green hue. I put my hair in a braid down my back just to keep it out of my face and I go to breakfast in the dining room. Finding that Haymitch has been coaching Tsubasa is no surprise to me. He shoots me a glare to try and make me go away. I am too hungry to leave, and I want to know how to behave in training. I put a cinnamon roll on my plate and take a seat at the table.

Haymitch obviously thinks I'm completely ignorant so he starts by saying "I know Tsubasa's mastered weapon and it's-"

"The sword. That's his weapon. Mine is the knife." I say, completely irritated that he thinks I'm that stupid. "He's amazing with the sword. He could kill all the tributes in one day if he wanted to."

"Oh. This is interesting. I know he was good, but I didn't think he was that good." Haymitch slurred.

"Sure, I'm awesome with the sword, but Rin's pretty good with the knives." Tsubasa grinned.

"Oh…no…er…" I stutter.

"Hm? If that's true then we might have a winner this year for once between the two of you." Haymitch articulated. "Here's the deal. Make a friend or two that's NOT the careers."

"Like we want to deal with those arrogant idiots." Tsubasa mumbled.

Haymitch chuckles. "I know, I know, I'm just making sure you don't go near them. Just don't get on their bad side. Make friends with the unknown talents, like for example, if a tribute from District 11 is magnificent with finding edible plants, try to make friends with them. It will be in your best interest to have a few allies. Don't even try to make it seem like you two are buddies. If you do, it's all over. And last but not least, do **not **show your strengths in front of the other tributes." He commands.

Obviously we were going to ignore the thing about us pretending to not be friends, but we weren't going to tell Haymitch that.

After breakfast, Effie whisks us to the training floor, also known as the basement. We'll be stuck here all day, in this hole. I sigh, and pretend to be happy. As we walk towards where the other tributes are, someone pins the number 12 on my back.

A woman gets up on a platform to talk to us about how training will work. The rules and guidelines are simple. There are plenty of stations around this gym that range from weapon mastering to rope tying to camouflage. There will be experts at each station to help you in learning a topic. If at a combative station, you are not allowed to engage in battle with a fellow tribute. There are dummies, robots, and assistants on hand to help you practice the technique. But tributes are allowed to help other tributes learn a skill as long as you do not fight in the process.

When she instructs us to start, immediately the career pack bolts to the weapons to help each other dominate and intimidate the tributes. I am overwhelmed until Tsubasa coaxes me back to reality. "Let's go train" he says with a smile.

We start at something a little simpler-the healing and edible plant station. It's a cinch for me. Identifying plants and healing with them comes naturally-probably because I'm mostly a visual and sometimes audio learner, so I can pick out plants by looks easily. After a few hours of this, I can heal countless wounds, feed myself, and much more.

Then, we walk over to the camouflage station. The expert there is an artist-I can tell. Swiftly, he teaches us to brush juices from berries, brush from leaves, and much more to hide our presence. I pick up some mud and swirl it around as I imagine what I may create. To start, I smear some on my hand to darken it even more. I then add some grass on top of it so that I blend with the square of terrain provided to practice.

Around the time I have my entire right arm done; I hear a voice right next to me, that isn't Tsubasa. I look up to find the guy, Sirix, admiring my work. He then asks "I'm nowhere as good as you-can you help me?"

Looking at his work, I know he's lying. He's made himself into grass practically. "Are you kidding? My work seems amateur compared to that!" I exclaim.

He gives me a grin and says "Well, if my work is that good, how about we work together?"

For the rest of the time until lunch, we turn each other in our threesome into grass. At lunch, we talk endlessly, the three of us. Sirix becomes a good friend very, very quickly. I learn so much I didn't know about his district during that time-apparently 6 is the scientific research and medicine district. His parents do special projects given by the Capitol-like things for the games, things for new electronics 3 should make, etc.

When we tell him about 12, he thinks it's pretty great, until we tell him about how it's in poverty, and everything is about survival. That's when for him, the pieces of the puzzle all come together. We are less talkative after that.

After every skill I feel more like a better friend to Sirix. When he asks if he can teach us to shoot with a bow and arrow, neither of us hesitates to answer yes. He demonstrates how to load and shoot in good form. Tsubasa gets the hang of it eventually. I am okay, but honestly, not that great. It'll take a while before my hand-eye coordination kicks in and I can do it.

Sirix comes over and laughs good-naturedly. "Need some help?" he asks, directly after he sees me shoot an arrow that lodges into the target next to mine. I nod, and he says a few tips, and then inquires "Is it okay if I touch you…um…to help you get it?"

"Not at all!" I reply with a nervous giggle.

Unexpectely, he puts his arms around me as his hands touch mine. He nuzzles his face on my shoulder, and in front of all the tributes, he does this to help me shoot a bull's eye.


	6. old 6

**MUCH MUCH FASTER THIS TIME BECAUSE ISABUGG BEGGED ME FOR IT.**

**BTW GO READ HER FANFICTIONS. THEY'RE AWESOME.**

6

People's eyes are on us. Once the arrow sinks into the target, Sirix lets go of me and walks to the side, with a slight grin on his face. "That worked well." He laughs a bit. "Do you understand it now?"

I nod, a little nervously. Sirix high-fives me, and then walks to another station. I look for Tsubasa-he has to have seen that situation, right? Sure enough, he's fiercely shooting arrows at the dummies with a scowl on his face. Okay, there's no way in hell he didn't see that. Looking for a reason to talk to him, I bring over some arrows.

"You were running low." I barely whisper.

"Don't you need to be with your new trainer or something? I see you've been getting very _personalized_ help." He coldly refers to Sirix.

"It's not like I was expecting him to hold me like that! I thought he was going to watch me and critique me verbally! I…he didn't mean to irritate you!" I say in a hushed tone. "How about I make it up to you-let's go to the garden tonight after dinner while Haymitch is drunk and Effie is stupid. Sound like a plan?" I promise.

He tries to hold a smile. "Okay."

Sirix joins us a little uneasily, but we accept him again and shoot targets until the end of training. I'm getting pretty good at archery, actually.

We exchange high fives, and walk to the elevators. Pressing 6 and 12, the elevator zips up to 6. Sirix leaves with a wink, and we go on up to 12. Effie squeals as she instructs us to go wash up and change for dinner.

After a quick shower, I dress in whatever the closet suggests for me. A black mini-skirt with a stripe of white along the bottom, dark leggings, a white polo shirt, a black tie, and black boots with white heels. I look sort of girlish, but not enough to be a wimp. I leave my hair down and walk to the dining room.

When I arrive, I look at Tsubasa. He's dressed simply in a nice white collared shirt, a black tie-which he left messily undone (and I know it's driving Effie insane)- and black pants. Funny enough, it seems complimentary for my outfit. Except I look weird and he looks great in it.

Effie's wig is white tonight, but not in an older lady way. More like how the other stylists look-kind of out of the ordinary. What makes is clash is the silver eye shadow she's wearing.

Haymitch is absent from this dinner. I search around the room, looking to see if he passed out drunk or something. Before the words can even get out of my mouth, Effie drones "I have no idea." Like she's telepathic and irritated.

The meal for tonight is a soup, full of vegetables in a chicken broth. There are egg noodles too. I eat a lot-I'm tired out from training.

Effie starts to tell us something important. "We were going to discuss strategy tonight, but your mentor wasn't exactly sober enough to be here." Her face turns into a glare, and she mutters blasphemies under her breath. Brightening up, she asks, "How was training?"

"Good. We learned many new skills, and we improved some old ones." Tsubasa answers.

Then, from start to finish, we describe in detail what happened. We leave out the part about Sirix and me, but in the end she seemed pleased with us. She was especially happy with our new ally, noting that he was a big hit with the capitolites. She dismisses us from dinner, leaving us alone.

Running to the elevator, I press the button with my fist. I'm so aggravated that Haymitch won't stay sober for more than three seconds to coach us. I then remember the reason I'm coming to talk to Tsubasa. Focusing my energy towards the task at hand, the elevator zips up and onto the top deck. Quickly, we race to the garden, just to make sure that no one else takes our place. After a fast check of the area around, we sit down together. Instead of the comfortable pose we were in last night, we sit at opposite sides of the bench. He's hunched over, arms resting on his knees, face turned down at the floor, and his black hair covering his face.

Then, after a few minutes of this, tears fall from his face. What am I supposed to do? I have to heal him somehow. The perfect idea hits me like lightning. I stand up and walk behind him. I rest my head on his shoulder and hold him similarly to how Sirix did to me. I link my arms around his neck, and whisper in his ear "You looked kickass shooting those arrows, you know."

"You don't have to make me feel better. I'm just sorry that I got all irritated at you. I don't know why but I just got all enraged at something and took my anger out at you! I'm 16 and I should know better. Ugh, please don't be angry back. I know I deserve it-"

I interrupt him "You do not in any way deserve my anger. Just because you're having a mood swing like every other tribute in these games does not mean you deserve anger back." I brush some of his bangs to the side. "Don't beat yourself up over it."

He blushes. "Rin, I need to tell you something…I-" He once again cannot finish his sentence, because we hear footsteps and rustling. Jumping into the bushes, we watch as none other than Sirix comes out and sits on the bench. He doesn't notice our presence, thankfully, but Tsubasa looks like he's going to kill him.

Sirix looks utterly mad. Like a demon is in front of him. "How do I know if she loves me?" He grabs a flower and starts murmuring things like "she loves me" and "she's my friend" and "she hates me." **(author note: awwww Sirix, you teenage girl you. but I promise he's not this feminine.)**

As he picks the last petal off he says "She wants us to be friends."

He has a wily smile on his face, and then it turns melancholy. "Well. Should of known." Under his breath he says a name.

It's mine.

This whole thing was for me? He picked a flower to find out what I thought of him?

Oh my god. Now this situation is a million times harder than I wanted it. I mouth the words "What do I do?" to Tsubasa, knowing that he totally heard this all too. He shrugs. I think. I should follow my heart. But my heart's telling me one thing and my brain is telling me something else. I hate this. I can't figure out what I should do. Think, Rin, think!

Tsubasa notices my moment of uncertainty, so he pushes me out of the bushes. I tumble out with a yelp, and I see his smile as he scurries out of the bushes to get back to the elevator. Sirix looks almost amazed, and asks, "What were you doing in the bushes?"

"Long story short: trying to hide so that I wouldn't be found here by some tribute and get beaten up or something." I say nonchalantly.

"Well, uh, do you want to sit down?" He asks.

I smile and nod, pacing over to take a seat on the bench. After a few moments of pure silence, he mentions "I'm sorry I held you in training today. It sure seemed to aggravate Tsubasa. I promise, I won't do it again."

"No, no, do it again if you need." The words float out of my mouth and freeze in the air. His face shows utter amazement. I rest my head on his shoulder "Just don't get me in trouble. I don't want to get mad at an awesome guy like you."

He closes his eyes and smiles. "Okay. I'll try my hardest."

The wind speaks for us for a while. I go to stand up, intending to leave, since it's really late out right now, and we've got more training tomorrow, but he stands up as well.

Unexpectedly, as always, he puts his hand on my shoulder and kisses my cheek. "Goodnight." He cooes.

After being a little startled by this, I feel warm inside, and reply, "Sleep well. We've got more training to do tomorrow, and I want you to help me."

I leave him be, and walk to the elevator. The button lights up at my touch, and I fall down to floor 12. My dreamy state stays until I walk past Tsubasa's suite. I then remember my broken promise to him. I have to say sorry somehow. I run into my room, take a piece of paper and then I write a note.

I fold it into thirds, and slip it under his door.

Resting in bed, I turn off the lights.

The minute my head hits the pillow, I'm out.

* * *

The song of a mockingjay wakes me out of my sleep. I left the windows a little open last night, and it seems the bird with it's coal feathers and long beak perched on top of the window, singing. My face brightens at the sight of it singing, and I stroll over to the window to listen for a while. After a few minutes, someone bangs on my door. Let me guess, it's Effie. I wish I could ignore her, but the mockingjay flies away. I open the door, and I ask, annoyed "What is so important you need to interrupt my sleep?" A small lie, but capitolites like her are not really enlightened at the mention of mockingjays, since they were a symbol of rebellion.

The reason they're associated with rebellion? During the time when the districts rebelled against the capitol, the capitol engineered muttations themselves since District 5 was refusing to help them. One of the muttations they made was a Jabberjay, a bird that could pick up human speech and repeat it back in the same exact voice and words. At first, it worked perfectly-they found all sorts of information from the birds-but then the District people found out, and they started feeding the birds lies one after the other. The Capitol found this out after the rebellion, and left the birds in the forest to starve and die. But they didn't die. They mated with female mockingbirds, and thus, the mockingjay was created. While they lost their ability to mimic speech, they could repeat song and tones, from a baby's warble to a man's deep singing. But with that species, it became a slap in the face to the Capitol. So the birds are not treated kindly here-but in the Districts 3 through 12, they're very admired-especially 12. The birds would even sing along with my violin.

Effie replies "Haymitch wants to talk to you in a few minutes. Get ready, get in the shower, and come on!"

I nod, and after closing the door, I undress and step into the shower. The water is warm and nice. Thinking, I decide to strategize in the shower, so Haymitch and I will have something to talk about.

The big thing I need to get across today is that I am more powerful than everyone thinks I am. I sort of look like a wimpy girl who can't fend for herself-great way to get yourself killed in the arena.

Today I should find another weapon I'm good at, besides the knife that I can use well. I know I was good at the bow and arrows, but just, I don't know, all three of us were good at that. I want to think outside the box, so if we're stuck in a bind, I can use whatever is available.

I go through the list of weapons I could use. Most weapons are either too heavy and I'm not exactly strong. The trident is one of those things.

In theory, you'd think I'd be good with an axe, but an ax is more like a boomerang-hard to control unless you've used it your whole life. Usually axes are for tributes from District 7 or the careers.

I might be able to use a scythe, but they rarely ever have scythes in the arena. There was one year that they only had scythes, but then again, that year every tribute got a bad training score. The winner was the girl who hid until the last minute and then used a sharp rock to kill the other tribute when they didn't expect it. She wasn't really a survivor; she just knew when to kill and when to hide.

Hand to hand combat is usually reserved for the guys. It's not sexist or anything, it's just how things always go. I figure that should be something I stay away from, since more than two thirds of the males could easily crush my skull if I picked a fight with them, not including Tsubasa and Sirix.

I then get the perfect idea. I'll work on mastering the sword so that if Tsubasa's in danger and I don't have my weapon with me, I can use his to kill the attacker. Easy enough, it seems perfect.

Turning off the water, I pace out of the shower, through the driers, press my hand on the electric box, and over to the closet.

Today's look has to be more of a tomboyish look. I wear a tunic-like shirt that's a color of forest green. A sweatshirt goes on top of it, a darker hue of green, and I wear blue jeans. The boots I wear are black, just like the ones I have at home. I don't even bother to put my hair in anything-I just leave it all silky and sort of messy.

When I run down to the dining room, the only person at the table is Haymitch. Oh joy.

"Hello sweetheart, how are you faring today?" He says in this sort of sarcastic voice.

"I know you don't give a damn, so why are you asking?" I grumble.

"Why do you think that?" He asks, groggily.

Now I'm pissed. "Because you don't even have enough respect to be sober for ten minutes to talk strategy with us at dinner. I know-Effie told us." I knock over his bottle of spirits and it falls off the table and crashes into a million pieces. "Just help us, okay? I know that Tsubasa is probably one of the only tributes you'll ever get that has a chance at winning. So take advantage of it!" I scream at him.

"How much of an ass do you think I am?" Haymitch yells. "I know that! I just…I just get a little distracted-just like you, little miss 'he's my best friend why are we being kept apart'."

I am an inch away from slapping him. "Just because you don't or never had a best friend doesn't mean you get to take it out on us!"

He says, "You have no idea."

I then remember the night on the roof. '_He had a love in the arena and doesn't want us to go in as friends because if one of us wins it will be painful like how it is for him._ _That explains his alcoholism! He must have tried to use alcohol to forget about whatever was haunting him from his friend and ended up being addicted to it!'_

"Just, please. Stay sober enough to help us." I walk over to pick up the glass, and I see a servant is there already. I help her and she smiles some. When all the bits are picked up, she dismisses me, and I sit back down.

When the servant leaves, he says, "You know, none of the attendants can speak here. They don't have tongues. It's called being an Avox."

"Why do they become an Avox?" I ask.

"Because they probably were a traitor or they committed a crime," He answers.

It seems the horrors of the capitol are endless. When someone commits a crime, you cut out their tongue and have them serve you. That's just utterly horrible.

"So! Strategy-what are you good at?" He asks. "I know you're a great knife user, but do you have any other skills?"

"Er…I can play the violin. I have good hand-eye coordination, but sports aren't my thing. I am agile-I can run for speed, but I'm not good at running very long distances fast. I could probably run to the cornucopia faster than anyone else. In training yesterday I found I can identify plants that heal and you can eat easily. I also learned how to shoot arrows from a bow. Besides that, I don't have any other really good skills."

Haymitch thinks this over. "Weaknesses?"

"I'm not very strong. I can't really hold anything larger than 10 pounds and be able to use it easily. I can't use hand-to-hand combat. I can't really jog far without losing my breath and having to walk. I'm sure there's other things, I just can't think of them." I answer.

"Well, between the two of you, we've definitely got a contender for winning." Haymitch smiles. "How good are you at the violin"

"If it was a weapon, I could kill all the tributes-even the careers-within the gong." I answer. "But does it really matter?"

"Not really, but sometimes people surprise you. Especially the Gamemakers. They're quite the ones for surprises." He says. "Now, when you're on your plate at the beginning, pinpoint necessary items, and when the gong sounds, RUN. If you even hesitate for a second, don't even try to go in there. Retrieve the items, and get the hell out of there. If you don't, I can't say what will happen, but it will be bad. Run as far as you can, and make sure you put a lot of distance between you and the center where the cornucopia was. Find a water source, and a cave or a tree for shelter. Always think about the repercussions of your actions, because if you don't, most tributes get killed for pure stupidity."

"I only kill when necessary." I tell him.

He ponders this. "I guess that is the best way to go about the situation. I hope that's how Tsubasa thinks too."

The same time his name is mentioned, Tsubasa walks in.

"I'm not even going to ask why the hell you were talking about me, but just don't do it ever again. It's creepy." He hides a smile.

Haymitch is a little flustered by this, but he ends up laughing a little.

I finally take something to eat-a cinnamon roll-and some water. We eat in silence for a while. When I'm done, I place the plates in the soapy water by the Avox's cleaning cart with the other plates.

I press the button for the elevator, but obviously a lot of tributes are going down, so I wait for the elevator. In that time, Tsubasa finished his breakfast so he's waiting with me. We enter the empty elevator that comes, and zip down to the training floor.

Today, we don't get an invitation-we just start. I run over to an easier station first-rope tying-just so I get back in the training feel. I tie a rope strong enough to hold onto a branch and let me climb it without the branch or the rope breaking.

I notice from the top of the artificial tree branch that Sirix is at the scythe station. He's using a gold scythe that shines from the harsh light of the training center. Tsubasa is at a fire-starting station. In his hand is a stick that has a small flame flickering on it.

I sort of find myself in a daze, and I end up falling out of the tree branch and hitting my arm, hard.

"Ugh," I groan as I roll onto my back. The trainer helps me onto my feet and leads me over to the medical cart over on the side wall.

I sit with an ice pack on my arm for a few minutes, hiding behind a stack of broken dummies. Finally the bruise is lighter, and it doesn't hurt anymore, so I stay away from the rope station and decide to start training with the sword. The expert is working with a career, so I ignore them, and try to mimic the moves I remember Tsubasa doing when we hunt together.

While I'm slashing a dummy, none other than Tsubasa himself comes over to watch. "Learning this as a second weapon?" he asks. I nod, and he gives me a high five. "Need any help?" He says, imitating Sirix's voice.

"Oh shut up." I say with a laugh.

"When Sirix asked you, you didn't refuse." He teases. "Am I not good enough?"

"Fine, you can help," I say defeated. I'm sort of happy, though. He rips a sword out of the case-a silver one with a more rectangular shape, unlike most swords, just like the one he used at home. While he teaches me, he pretends to be mediocre so no one knows his strength.

We hack away at robots and dummies and etcetera, until lunchtime.

At lunch today, Sirix tells us about life in District 6.

"My parents do research for pretty much anyone. I help them sometimes, because a lot of it ends up having to do with the Games. One year, they did an experiment, ordered by the capitol, to find what weapons kids 12 to 18 can master easiest. They got kids to come out of school to try out knives, spears, bows and arrows, swords, axes and more. I was going to go last in the experiment, so I secretly tested out a bow and some arrows daily, and since school got out for 5 days due to the study, I had plenty of time. When I shot my first arrow, it just felt right, so I kept shooting. Then, when it came time for me to be tested, my parents were in awe at my skills. I was allowed to keep the bow. So, since then, I've used it, and trained myself." He explained.

"That's cool." I said. I feel a little wary, since his parents worked with the Gamemakers, but it's probably nothing to worry about.

"I have to admit, that's pretty awesome" Tsubasa replies.

Sirix gives us a genuine smile, and for the rest of the time he tells us stories of District 6 because other topics are dangerous with the tributes looming over us.

When lunch is over, Tsubasa whispers "I'm going to go to another station, since if I help you any more, people will know it's my strength." He's talking about the sword station. I nod, and resume my position there. The expert finally helps me, and teaches me only a few new techniques, since I already know a lot. He then leads me to a series of robots to fight while he works with a different tribute.

Before I can even start, I hear yelling. District 1 is yelling at someone.

"Get out of this station, District 12." The boy grunts.

Oh no. What crap is Tsubasa getting told now?

"You don't control the training area." Tsubasa sharply replies.

"Well none of us want you here. Go away." By us, District 1 is referring to his fellow careers with him, including his sensual partner and dark haired, snarky looking boy from District 2.

"Then why don't **you** move?" Tsubasa snaps, his voice rising. By now, he's been cornered by the tribute. District 1 clenches his fists.

Suddenly, I take the sword in my hand and use it as a knife. I fling it so that it doesn't hit him, but it gets close enough to intimidate him. Sinking into the wall, it's in extremely close proximity to his neck. One false move and he's dead.

Tsubasa looks amazed at me, almost in a good way.

District one is smart not to move as I walk over to take the sword out of the wall. Swiftly, I put it away and I turn to him. "Don't you dare terrorize Tsubasa unless you really are looking for death. I let you off the hook this time, but mark my words, do it again and you won't be living in the arena." I threaten.

You can hear every one of my steps as I walk away.

**Okay, that had a lot of action in it. 4160 words of action.**

**I particularily liked the fight between Rin and Haymitch. I thought of it as I was typing up my written draft, since I thought this chapter needed it.**

**Next chapter is REALLY long. It has the gamemakers and the interviews, but I'll probably end up splitting the two, since otherwise you'd get a 10,000 word chapter DX**

**So next time, tune in for Rin's session with the Gamemakers!**

**By the way, I have all of part one written down. I hope that by memorial day we can be onto the games, so that this summer I can finish the first book.**

**So yeah. Reviews?**


	7. old 7

**Hey guys. Sorry about a later update ;n; this only includes the gamemakers, since I don't want to end up with only 8 chapters in part one. but enjoy :)**

**if you read this, REVIEW IT! I reply to most all of my reviews! I love love love to know who reads my writing (since I'm pretty sure almost no one does)**

**enjoy :)**

* * *

7

Most surely, the careers are out to kill me, and they'll make it very bloody, so that everyone in Panem will have to watch. Because what I've done is unforgivable. I've messed with a career. A "measly" District 12 girl challenged a boy from District 1's superiority. Unless I obtain a mind-blowing training score, I'm doomed.

I hide at the water-filter-making post for the rest of training. I watch Tsubasa throw spears and Sirix climb trees until we're dismissed.

At dinner, I'm silent. I can't tell anyone what I did. Haymitch might laugh, but Effie will be horrified. While eating, I'm asked many questions about what happened today, and I answer in one or two sentences. Thankfully, Tsubasa had the same idea as me, and he pretends that he learned how to throw a spear without anyone giving him crap about what station he's at. I know Effie's buying into it, for she's so glad we did well today and raves on and on about how she might actually get a winning District this year. Thanks Effie. I could care less what you think.

Then, after dinner, I don't even bother going up to the top deck today. I just run to my room. Laying on my bed, my eyes water, and after a while, I silently cry.

I'm going into a game where kids kill each other. One person out of 24 lives. My best friend is with me. I met another guy who's a great friend. Only one of us can live, if even that. I challenged the careers. I will be dead soon. My mentor can't help me. Livia, my family, and my few friends will watch me die.

Could my life get any worse?

A knock on the door makes me jump. I answer it and there's Tsubasa, with his black hair and gray eyes, flesh and blood, standing in front of me.

"If you're thinking about suicide, there's a force field around the roof you know. You can't jump." He almost smiles. "Good thing-I definitely don't want the next victor to be dead, right?"

His comment makes me smile a little, but the end part just wipes the smile off my face. "I can't win. I won't live to see the light of day after the opening gong, thanks to the careers."

"You're not going to die." He says.

"Keep saying that-in no time I'll be dead." I say with a smirk.

"You know, you keep saying that the careers want you dead-it's not true. I was listening to them. They either respect you or are a little freaked out by you. Well, except for District One guy. But, then again, you have two allies and yourself. We can take him out." He beams.

Then I get it-Sirix, Tsubasa and I, we're like a second career pack. We all specialize in weapons, we all are survivalists, but yet we're much nicer and less bloodthirsty. I don't want to kill anyone.

The worst part I'm finding of these games is that the majority of the tributes are innocent people who get their lives thrown away for entertainment.

For example, there's the girl from District 3. She's barely thirteen and is going to have her life thrown away-even if she does win. She's so quiet; she hides behind her crow black hair. It's jagged, and falls on top of her glasses. When she worked by me in the fire-starting station, she was very mute. She smiled a lot as an answer to questions. I overheard her district partner saying how she is a great inventor-always thinking up new ideas and creating them for use. In her district, everyone thought she was going to invent some of the newest technologies for tomorrow. But now, she'll be lucky if she even gets something to help her see in the arena. I'm sure that she could do something with a piece of glass to see-if she can find one. What depresses me most is that like every tribute, she had a future for herself and the Games have taken it away.

If I could, I'd take her as an ally. She seems really resourceful. In training, I saw her make a weapon out of a simple coil of wire. Looking up at Tsubasa, I think to ask him if we should add her as an ally, but we've already got Sirix, and I don't want to end up having to kill her.

Tsubasa pats my head, and walks off. "Go to bed. Tomorrow we'll show the Gamemakers what we're made of."

Blinking some, I run and follow him.

When I arrive at my room, I fall onto my bead and sigh. I order warm milk and some warm baked cookies. Inhaling the humid smell of the cookies, I start to dip them in my milk. As I finish, I set the plate on the table and sometime after that, I doze off.

* * *

I wake after a dream. I don't exactly remember it, but I was with the girl from District 3. Her youth shone as we ran around through a meadow with flowers. But the innocence and beauty lasted only for a bit, as it turned into a nightmare with the boy from District 1 chasing us. The girl wasn't fast enough, as a spear was about to go directly into her heart when I woke up with sweat all over my body.

Panting, I try to process what has just happened. "It wasn't real." I have to repeat that to myself over and over again. To get my mind of the nightmare, I dress in a simple white shirt, a pair of pants, and the same boots I wore yesterday. It takes a few splashes of cool water to make sure that I'm still in reality.

I stride down to the dining room, feigning composure. I nod a little, to say hello to Haymitch who seems out cold. Not to my surprise, he's got a bottle of alcohol in his hand. So when I finish breakfast, I quickly get in the elevator. It feels empty as Tsubasa isn't in it, but we stop at floor six, to pick up Sirix and the female tribute. Sirix, as always, gives me a warm smile, but the girl-who looks no older than fifteen, and sort of ugly in a way-gives me an icy stare. Returning the favor with a glare, I then ignore her and watch as the elevator shoots downwards, towards the training center.

The morning is uneventful as the feeling of competition looms over the tributes. As I ignore the others and walk to a few stations, I still have the same feeling as everyone. We all know the afternoon is when the real fun begins. In the afternoon, we'll be having a private session where the gamemakers watch us show them our best skill. Us, meaning the tributes. Depending on what you do and how well you do it, the Gamemakers rate you a score 1-12-12 being unachievably high and 1 being extremely bad.

When lunch comes around, everyone eats in silence, as district by district all the tributes are individually called out of lunch starting with District 1 and then 2,3,4 and so on. The male one of the district comes out first, and then the girl. So I'll be going last of all.

They call Sirix, and I murmur "Good luck," to him. He nods a little.

Tribute after tribute, the room empties, and finally when they call Tsubasa, I'm then in an empty room. I run my finger on my glass' rim, wiping away a drop of water. I continue this practice until I'm called, since I don't really have much else to do anyways.

When I'm called, I push my seat in and walk to the training room.

But it's too late. The gamemakers have been here way too long. They're drunk, mad, or unconscious. Others watch for the roast pig to be placed in front of them. Only Seneca Crane, the head gamemaker, is paying attention.

To try to attract their attention, I run over to the knife station and throw a few knives. The first one lands in the dummy's heart, the second in its skull, and the third in its neck. When I look over at the gamemakers, there's no improvement other than Seneca Crane slightly nodding.

Then, I know I need to do something more. To get a good training score I have to stun them. I have to amaze them. So I muster all the sound in my body I can make and scream "Hey!"

A wine glass drops. But that's all the noise made.

Seneca Crane asks, "What do you need?"

What do I need? What can I show them to make them listen? The idea hits me and I find myself asking, "I know it's not in here, but can I be granted a violin?"

Some gamemakers groan, others laugh a little, but only a trace of a smile can be found on his lips. He calls over an Avox and has him go to find me one. Sure enough, when he comes back, in his hands is an almond-y brown violin-perfectly in tune. I grab the bow that goes with it and tighten it some. While doing so, I think about how it's called a bow-could I in reality drag some arrows over here and shoot with this?

I brush the idea out of my mind and put the violin on my shoulder. After I take a breath, I start with a flaunty caprice, one that will set the gamemakers in an excited tone. The complexity and the showy-ness just add to what it means. I can tell I have everyone in the room's attention, so I do whatever I can to keep it.

When the piece is finished, the gamemakers seem utterly stunned. Almost to a point that I swear one of them hasn't blinked since I started. Seneca claps some, and everyone else joins in. Giving a slight bow, he adds, "You are dismissed."

The last thing I remember seeing is some of the gamemakers marveling over the dummy that held the three knives I threw.

* * *

I arrive at dinner refreshed and hopeful. Luckily, the best meal so far is warm and ready. Fish in a thick sauce with nuts, rice that tastes of a lemon, chicken broth with vegetables and egg noodles are all on the menu. I take a taste, expecting something good, and I'm rewarded with a heavenly meal.

While I'm scarfing down the soup, Haymitch slams his bottle on the table and asks, surprisingly sober sounding "Okay. Time to tell us-how did your sessions with the gamemakers go? Did you fail as much as everyone else I've mentored?"

"If you're talking about scores, probably." Tsubasa groans. "They didn't even pay attention. Only Seneca Crane bothered to pay attention to me, and the rest were just sitting around, snacking on roast duck. Finally, after destroying an army of robotic dummies, I couldn't take it anymore. I just stabbed their stupid duck with my sword and walked out. The gamemakers were too drunk to care anyways."

Effie centers herself and then calmly says "I agree that it's not really fair of them to not pay attention just because you're the last people to see them. How about you Rin? How did it go for you?"

As all eyes fixate on me, I know any lie I would utter would be found false. Cinna raises his eyebrows, smiling a little, so he must know I did something crazy. I don't know what to tell these people other than "They were drunk. Utterly mad." The words fly out of my mouth, and I wish they hadn't. "I mean, they were feasting, and no one was paying attention except Seneca Crane. I threw a few knives, but I was getting nowhere, so I um…well…"

"What?" Haymitch scolds. "Say it!"

"I asked them for a violin." I say, clueless to what reaction will come from it. I clench my hands and squirm some in my seat a little, nervous that I was wrong to tell them that I gave the gamemakers a concert.

The silence following my last truth is long, and only agonizes me more for what is to come.

Haymitch, the last person I wanted to hear from, speaks first. "Are you kidding me?" His small chuckle turns into a full-blown laughing fit. "A violin?" As he cracks up, I feel a bit helpless, but Effie gives him a dirty look, and he stops snickering immediately.

Effie seems very fond of this, and asks "Well, what did you play for them?"

I swallow and continue. "I played this intricate song that still sounded very nice for their party. At the end, they clapped and I took a bow."

Tsubasa seems to be enjoying this, as he says "I don't think my training session can top that. You definitely were unpredictable for them."

Unpredictable.

That reminds me of Haymitch, talking about how unpredictable the Gamemakers are. How I never know what could happen. It seems I have been unpredictable right back at them.

Cinna grins, and says, "Well, it's time to get those training scores."

We file into the room to receive the scores, and it seems that District 1 has just started. The arrogant face of the male tribute shows up on the screen, and a 9 to accompany his picture. That seems pretty low for a career, especially with his attitude being so surly and egoistical. As the tributes roll by, I catch a few scores. The girl from 3 receives an 8, very good for her district. Sirix is presented with a 10, so I know he shot some arrows for the gamemakers. There's no way they'd give him a 10 otherwise-it's just too high for people like us. The girl from 7 scores a 9. The boy from 10 acquires a 7.

The room's intensity becomes tenser when the final tribute before us is shown. Waiting seconds seems like hours, and while us in the room do, you could hear a pin drop. The score then flashes on the screen-10! No wonder the gamemakers had to have been watching him and taking note of his combat. As good cheer fills the room, congratulatory pats on the back are given and compliments run out of Effie and my mouths. No one seems to notice the screen until my picture fills the screen and an 11 is posted next to it.

No one seems to believe it, until Tsubasa beams at me and says "Well, you seem to have struck a chord with the gamemakers."

After this comment, the room is filled with cheers, as District 12 is a winner this year. I have the highest score and Tsubasa one of the top 3. Cinna ruffles my hair and winks "I can imagine your dress for the interviews already."

"Good job, sweetheart." Haymitch says sincerely enough. I guess he really now believes we stand a chance in the arena, with our high scores and all.

Tomorrow is preparations for the interviews. I've got 3-4 hours with Effie, then another 3-4 hours with Haymitch. Joy.

As I slump over to my room, my emotions are all wrong. I feel indifferent, if not bored. Shouldn't I be gleeful? Happy? I did score the highest. Emptiness fills my body, and I forget about changing. I just strip off my clothes and sleep under the silk covers in my underclothes. The glossy feeling fabric cools my body as I fall into a slumber.

* * *

I stir to the sound of Effie's usual jingle of "It's another big, big, big day!" and the rapture on the door. I don't even bother to walk out of bed-I just groan loudly and pull the covers over my face. She steadily opens the door and walks over to my bed. She first turns up the lights, and then prattles about how the day will go. "It's going to be so exciting, so embrace the day, and smile!" is one of the lines she feeds me.

After dragging me out of bed, she insists I put on the full length gown for my coaching today. The dress she picked makes me want to gag-it's pink, frilly, and full of faux pearls. I'm practically shoved into it, and we walk over to her room.

Much to my nonexistent joy, she gives me high heels and has me prance around in them. Despite my cries of protest, she teaches me how to walk in the heels. The more I think about it, if Effie can frolic around in them nonstop, I'm determined to master the skill as well. By noon, I have to be a polite girl, and by evening, I must be an interesting one.

I utterly despise all the things we do. She has me sit like a lady, she fixes the way I talk, because apparently it's horrible that I don't have a somewhat capitolite way of speaking, and I have to learn how to smile appropriately.

I finally snap when she insists I say fifty dumb phrases beginning, in the middle, or ending with a smile. When I go to repeat her speech, I mimic her by saying "It's so _grand_ to be with you all," as the sarcasm drips off my voice. Of course, this sends her into a fury of lectures about how important it is to smile and how etiquette will set you free or whatever, and how I'll be so charming if I just used her as a role model and blah, blah, blah.

Suddenly, I can't take one more second of it. "Just shut up! I could care a lot less about what you think qualifies as 'charming'!"

Perplexed, she stutters a yell of "F-f-f-FINE! I can't wait to see how you conduct yourself during the interviews!" as she trots over and forces me out of the room.

The first thing I do when I arrive back at my room is strip off the stupid dress she gave me. I then dress in more appropriate clothes, that being a nice white tunic like shirt and black pants. Then, I sit on the bed and take my anger out on the pillows, for I know they're one of the things I haven't managed to screw up yet. I order a box of chocolates and messily eat them on the bed, strewing the wrappers everywhere. The only thing that makes me pick them up is the face of my Avox, who played the music for me, picked up the glass of Haymitch's bottle, and the one who throughout losing what is probably her whole life kept a straight face. I pick up wrappers until it's time for lunch, but what I thought would be lunch turns out to be instead being once again dragged into Haymitch's room for coaching. He mutters profanity and what I make out to be Tsubasa's name along with it.

When we enter, he asks me one question. "Who are you?"

I know he's not asking me in reality, he's asking who I want to be shown as in from of the audience. I think about the question.

He offers some help. "Are you a fierce killer?"

"Definitely not." I groan.

"How about a funny, light hearted girl?"

"Not here, in front of the Capitol who wants me dead."

"Humble?"

"Sort of."

I can tell my passiveness is irritating Haymitch, because he screams at me "Well, you're not sexy, not dark, not dramatic, not cocky, and not elusive to use any of those as an angle. So who are you?"

"Weird." I state.

"Let's try sly." He advises.

So for thirty or more questions, I act sly, but he doesn't think I'm exactly wily enough, so we go through more angles: Innocent? My training score doesn't reflect it. Witty? Yes, but I can't add arrogant or strong to it to make the angle better. Extroverted? After one question we both agree that would fail. Logical thinker? Let's not go there.

When Haymitch suggests mysterious, my face lights up. I am mysterious, since weird is pretty much synonymous with mysterious. Or at least to Haymitch. So when our time is up, he says to close, "It'll have to do." Which in Haymitch speak means 'good'.

Dinner has two sides: a silent feud between Effie and me, and a conflict between Haymitch and Tsubasa. So when it's over, I run back to my room and lock the door. Not even the best lamb stew can fix this.

Instead of my dreams, nightmares of the arena plague my head. And in all of them, I'm not who I am.

**Next time: the interviews :D**

**also, me and isabugg have developed a system where every other week we'll update, only it's staggered, so one week Two Fires will be updated, and while you're waiting your two weeks for the next chapter, I'll update this inbetween :D mostly it's because isabugg really wants me to update more XD so I'll see you in two weeks (or less if I can manage)**


	8. old 8

**Oh my god I'm so sorry I got like AWFULLY SICK AND COULDN'T UPDATE. PLEASE FORGIVE ME AND REVIEW**

**this one is too short DX**

**well, enjoy none the less**

8

Once again, I'm with Venia, Flavius, and Octavia. But, with the interviews a few hours away, they're working like lightning. They may banter here and there, but most of the time, they've been assigned specific jobs-evening my skin tone, silkening my hair, painting my nails white. After an hour of hard work they've done all that and they've added a shimmering silver powder all over my body.

Cinna arrives with a covered hanger, which I infer to be my dress. He instructs me to "Close your eyes."

Waiting in anticipation, I hear the sharp reverberation of the zipper being pulled down as they uncover my gown. I feel a light sheet of cloth being placed on my body. The fabric is weightless on my body, but I don't feel naked.

Opening my eyes, I see a human that seems supernatural. My dress is electricity. Sparks come out as I pace around in a circle. The sandals I wear are at least three inches shorter than Effie had me in, and they are made of some silver material. My hair contrasts with the lightness of the dress and my eyes seem to blend in, as silver eye shadow makes my eyes rather striking.

I must have utter shock on my face, because Cinna chuckles for a bit.

"Where on earth do you think of ideas like this, Cinna? And where on earth do you find a fabric like this?" I gasp.

Answering me, he responds, "The fabric has a high friction rate. When it gives off the heat, the fabric translates it into sparks. Easy as that."

I feel phantasmagoric. "Thank you for this Cinna." I barely whisper.

Pushing my chin up, the sides of his mouth curl upwards. "Let's make it even better with a smile."

As I grant him the beam, the prep team bursts into enthusiastic applause. Venia seems pleased with all the work, as she pats me on the back. Cinna inquires, "Are you ready?"

I nod.

"Let's go."

So we run to the elevator together.

The elevator ride is short as always, but when we arrive at City Circle, Haymitch is there with my final advice. "Even if you have to step out of mysterious, just stay pleasant. No matter how much you hate them." He actually looks somewhat presentable in a suit and not holding a bottle of rum in his hand. Soon after, Effie comes to round up everyone, so Cinna gives me a final squeeze.

Walking onto the stage, it's as if someone threw me into a dream. The platformed stage is lit up almost magically for the event. The interviewee's chair looks phantasmagoric with it's gold plating that reflects the light. The place where the capitolites stand is lit by lanterns, with a single candle in each-at least I think it's a candle.

As we tributes sit down, Tsubasa smiles at me, and asks "You ready?"

"Yup. Time to amuse an audience of strangers." I grin.

I have a moment to scan the first few tributes. District 1 looks arrogant as he rests his body on his "throne" like a Roman emperor, smiling cockily. That dirty bastard. He just ticks me off. He's dressed today in some copper gladiator armor with a crown of olive leaves on his head.

His partner tribute looks ditzy and slow as she gazes emptily into the audience. Wearing a silver see-through gown, she attempts to ask how she looks to the girl from District 2 who is the polar opposite of her. She has straight hair in a muted brown color that ends perfectly straight as well, with bangs that stop exactly above her light blue eyes. Her face is knit into an eternal scowl even with her sky blue frock that signals innocence.

Then, Caesar Flickerman comes onstage to quiet the crowd. Donning his usual midnight-blue tuxedo and similarily colored hair and lips, he looks somewhat freakish, but not as bad as the year when he used he color crimson and appeared to be bleeding. He starts the crowd off with a few jokes and then the interviews have started. They call a boy by the name of "Copper Metriculius", and then the boy from District One is walking up to the chair of honor.

Copper Metriculius. I knew District 1 names were ridiculous, but this is something. I'm not even sure either counts as a name.

But Copper says something semi-frightening, or at least he tries to make it frightening. He'll kill anyone and everyone that gets in his way, meaning not only will he kill the careers one by one, he'll be...

"And let me tell you, I already have two people on my list to be exterminated once the gong sounds." he appeals, staring directly into my eyes. Yes, my supicions have been confirmed. Sweating, I hold back screaming every curse word I can think of at him. The buzzer goes off, and his time is up. I glare icily at him as he walks back to his seat. Blowing a kiss at me, he beams cockily. I so want to kill him.

The girl from District 1 is as airheaded as I thought, answering not so brightly to Caesar's questions. Both tributes from District 2 are fierce killers, but the boy is barely 14 so it's even more creepy.

Things become very interesting when the little 13 year old girl from District 3, named Mayu, is asked about her parent.

"Well, uh...you know...she was pretty angry about it." She stammers.

"I'd think, with your mom being a victor, and especially with her speech problem..." Caesar mysteriously trails off. The audience gives pitied sighs, but I know they'll just forget once the blood is spilled. I swear, these Capitolites have hearts of stone.

Nothing of facsination happens until Sirix. Going along with no theme of any kind other than "Apollo", he is wearing a suit that looks like it was splattered gold in some places. It surprisingly works, but his smile is brighter than the gold as he flashes the crowd a genuine one. Playing the cameras right seem to be his strength, as he and Caesar can act like longtime friends while they banter about plenty of topics. Caesar has fun with the fact that Sirix's hair is bronze when everyone else in the district, including his parents, have mute colors of brown and black for hair colors, asking "Where did you come from?" Sirix then retaliates with "That's funny coming from the guy who's had every color under the sun!" and they laugh good-naturedly.

His partner tribute was as interesting as a rock though.

The girl from District 7 was a roudy, wild partier. The crowd went crazy for her, cheering and all.

Before I know it, they're calling Rin, so I float off my seat and into the ornate chair set before me.

Caesar, as jovial and happy as in the beginning, loudly introduces me, saying "Aelius! My girl!"

"Rin," I correct him.

"Rin, oh Rin, how you've charmed us all. It's such a pleasure to meet you in person." he gushes.

I remember Haymitch. _ Even if you hate them._ "Oh, but...being here, with you, wearing stunning clothes and eating decadent foods-it's magical, Caesar, it really is." That should do it.

"You're too kind!" He pretends to faint, and I laugh dryly, a little after the joke. I don't know how Sirix does it so easily-I'm not good at this. "Speaking of dresses, what in the world are you wearing?" Caesar tastefully transitions into Cinna's brilliant designs.

Now I can be real. "Cinna, he's nothing short of a genius. You saw my parade outfit, right?"

The audience murmurs positively, and he says "Yes, yes, the coal and electricity was ingenious. You looked dazzling."

"Wait 'till you see this." I answer, as I stand up. Cinna doesn't have to motion. Knowing it's time, I twirl around as sparks devour my dress. Gasping in assent, the crowd is mesmerized by my dress.

"Cinna deserves a round of applause, for I don't think we've seen a dress this facsinating ever!" Caesar encourages, as the audience bursts into applause. Reluctantly, Cinna bows, and motions back over to me.

"Now Rin," Caesar strikes a serious tone. "It's about time you told us where that 11 in training came from."

I gulp. "Well...er...um...the Gamemakers definitely got a show. You might get to see in the games what it was. I think that's all I'm allowed to tell you." I add, keeping up with the mysterious angle.

Seneca Crane, with his dark eyes and striking face looks directly at me. Desperately, he wants me to tell them what happened. But, he knows that promises him nothing good. So he just keeps his steady gaze.

"Well, I guess we have another reason to tune in tomorrow!" Caesar reminds the viewers. I laugh hollowly, even though I want to wail about being sent to die tomorrow.

Caesar picks things up again, asking me, "How about your family? Friends?" He enunciates friends, so a know he wants me to gush over Tsubasa or reveal Sirix to the crowd as my ally. But I won't. So I have to think fast, fast, friends, er, friends...

"There's a girl at my school named Katniss. She's very strong, and I thoroughly admire her." I blurt out. I don't stop there though. "You could say I was friends with the baker's son. We were on good terms with each other-his name is Peeta. There's also the mayor's daughter, Madge. She gave me my token." **(***AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I'm changing it. Rin's getting the mockingjay pin. But trust me, it has other meanings than Katniss did.***)** And suddenly, I'm gushing about everyone. Greasy Sae. Darius, a peacekeeper. Gale, the boy who would have gone with me. Delly, the sweetest of the girls. I'm stopped by the buzzer when I start to talk about Livia; Caesar is beside himself, though.

"You...you must be missed back in District 12." Caesar muses. "Well, best of luck to you, Rin."

I know I have done well, because Haymitch wears a smirk on his face in the audience. As I sit down, Tsubasa stands up and walks to the throne.

Caesar tries to get him to open up, but it's failing. Sadly, I can tell by how mute he is acting. But, that never stops Caesar. So, he asks, "I'll get down to what we really want to know first-what...is...your relation to Rin?"

Tsubasa lightly blushes, shakes it off, and firmly answers, "We're very good friends."

Doing the unthinkable, Caesar then questions, "Is that what you want?"

You could hear a pin drop just before Tsubasa replies, "No. You know what? I'll tell you what emotions have been hiding the past years or so. No, I'll show you."

He stands up and walks over to me.

I then find his lips pressed on mine

**INTENSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (+ predictable sorry we all knew it was going to happen)**

**Anyways Chapter Nine I am halfway through typing so that one will be coming soon.**

**to compensate for a measly chapter 8 (1890 words OH MAN I FAIL)**

**okay I pinky swear from now on my chapters have to be more than 2,500 words to publish it DX**

**okay now go read isabugg's stories**

**kthxbai**

**also the arena will be much cooler than the first part**

**NOW REVIEW I BEG OF YOU PLEASE REVIEW THIS ;u;**


	9. old 9

**OKAY I SO DESERVE VIRTUAL SLAPS**

**LIKE NOW**

**AND CRITIQUES**

**THIS IS ONE OF MY BETTER CHAPTERS, BUT STILL, YOU GUYS DON'T DESERVE THIS.**

**CHAPTER 10 IS GOING TO BE OUT VERY VERY VERY SOON.**

**SO BEAR WITH ME**

**AND THANK isabugg FOR EDITING THIS. WITHOUT HER EDITS THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN HORRENDOUS (see what I mean?)**

9

Two seconds.

That's around the amount of time of silence for everyone to perceive what's going on. Then, the audience screams and squeals earsplittingly, some flailing their arms, a few even faint. While they go berserk, the pieces of the puzzle all fit together. Why he volunteered, the rooftop, making sure I was alright, why he was jealous at Sirix. _He, for all that time, was hiding that he was in love with me._ _He loves me. He loves me._ It takes a while for this to sink in. I don't know if I can even believe all of this.

His lips are surprisingly warm and somewhat sweet. My eyes are wide while his are shut tightly, his charcoal colored hair eclipsing his eyes. A sense of urgency vibes through the kiss as he seems to lean in. Confusion and surprise on my part dulls the passion I think he was hoping for. He pulls out, and we stare at each other. As I study his features, I see sorrow painted all over as he barely murmurs an apology.

When he walks back, I can see Caesar, who is utterly astonished. He throws himself onto the throne like it's a torture device. Caesar asks, "Did she know?"

"Uh...I don't think so." he answers as a blush etches his face deep red. Retaining an bored expression, he adds a, "I think she was pretty ignorant when it came to my feelings." and the cameras eat up my face instantly. My face flushes, and so I look elsewhere, desperately wanting to run away from the City Circle to somewhere I'll be safe. My muscles grow stiff, and adrenaline runs through my body. Feeling a bit queasy, I blurrily try to sense what is going on.

The next person that invades my thoughts is Sirix. I look at him and my lead-gray eyes find his ocean blue irises only to find that those eyes flit away and stare intensely at the ground. He seems to fidget in his seat. Is it an illusion? Or are his gold accents much duller than they were?

The wails from the audience are so deafening that Caesar is unable to calm them down. It's almost comical how little the buzzer does to shut them up. Only the anthem blasted at full volume can make them remember what we are and who they are in this world. As the tributes rise, I study the floor, as if it was the most interesting piece of art in the world. I admire the orange and marroon swirls in the marble-like surface.

Tsubasa is smart enough to not entwine his hand in mine because I see the other tribute's icy stares at us.

After saying his goodnights, Caesar dismisses us tributes and reminds the Capitolites to tune into the Games tomorrow morning. We file into the elevators swiftly, and I don't bother to look at the other tribute in the elevator with me. But, I find a familiar hand, with it's scars and calluses reaching for the 12 button. Suddenly, I'm unable to stop eyeing him.

Tsubasa attempts an apology."I'm…sorry. If you don't feel the same way it's alright with-"

I stop his words immediately with my own mouth, as I kiss him. I need him. It's no use hiding it any longer, because in the arena we could be dead at any moment. But I don't want to lose him. After a moment of being startled by my actions, he relaxes. A spark in my chest makes my empty hands run through his hair, which has a comforting feel unlike every other thing in this hellish, over-the-top Capitol. He rests one of his palms on my back, near my waist, and uses the other to caress my face in such a way that a jittery feeling runs up my spine. Only my pulse, echoing through my ears, makes noise. All seems perfect, so perfect I don't want to lose it.

A high pitched squeal from Effie is all it takes for us to flinch and stare at her awkwardly as, besides our mouths being apart, my hands are still in his hair and his arms are still locked around me. We split apart somewhat slowly, because there's a mutual feeling of 'Effie sort of ruined the moment'.

"Oh! You two!" she starts blabbering about how cute we are and how 'we should keep this angle up'. Keep this angle up?

His hand, strong and warm, takes my frigid ones."Sorry to burst your bubble Effie, but it's not an angle." A sheepish grin appears on his face and...

BAM! Suddenly I see Sirix, beaming the same way. _"Well, if my work is that good, how about we work together?"_ is the dialogue that goes with that boy. A somewhat disturbed expression must have run on my face, for I am stared at like a mentally insane human. I brush his name away from my thoughts and pretend I was trying to kill a fly.

If only that remark before would make Effie up. But no, she only prattles more and more, so when Haymitch calls us over by him, I consider it a miracle and scurry over.

"I thought it would be unfair not to tell you, but I intended this all along. It was a trap, per say, and you fell right into it." He slightly smirks.

"Wait a second-the whole 'we're death enemies' angle was fake? Just a part of your master plan?" I say.

"Yeah. Hell, that was the core of it." He replies.

"Well...damn. You sure outsmarted me." Tsubasa laughs a little. "When did you realize that the plan would work?"

"Oh, no, I knew the minute you volunteered you had more than just 'friendship' feelings for her." Haymitch says.

"This is getting sappy; I'm going to eat." I groan and stomp off to the rhythm of Haymitch's laughter.

Cinna is to my right as always, but somehow, everything seems different at the dinner table, as awkwardness takes over. But somehow we all start talking about the other tributes' interviews. First and foremost, Haymitch tells us he got a good chuckle out of Copper's interview because of how illogical he was; he wants to team up with the Careers but yet he wants them dead, and he announces that in front of them. "See how long he'll survive," he slyly smiles, as a bowl of broth is set in front of him.

Effie then mentions Mayu, and murmurs about how she's met her mother, and she "never deserved this." Yeah Effie. I doubt you actually will care once the blood is spilled.

Portia then gushes about her favorite. "Oh, that girl, Lindsey, from District 7, she was so much fun to listen to. I mean, I wanted to get as wound up as her! She seemed to act like the Games would be a party." she says with some laughter.

Cinna adds, "Don't forget Sirix from District 6. He was so relaxed, it was almost like him and Caesar were longtime friends! I couldn't stop laughing when he made fun of Caesar's numerous hair colors. I tell you...the man has serious...issues..."

Us tributes flinch, as we sort of forgot that we never mentioned Sirix to everyone here, so I hold my tounge and just nod with a polite grin.

Haymitch has obviously watched tons of interviews, so it's no surprise he blurts out, "An interesting, nice looking tribute from District 6. Man, is that a change from the usual."

"He is actually very interesting. We did training with him, and he seems like a good ally." Tsubasa slips up.

"What the...?" Is the mutual response of the rest of the table.

"Well, I guess District 6 and us will be good friends this year. Morphlings, yay." Haymitch grumbles and he slams his liquor bottle onto the table, spilling all over. He yells for an avox, but I rush nervously to clean it up and I throw the bottle away.

That does little, since everyone is given wine by the servers before a delectable dessert tray comes before us. I don't drink any of it, since I don't entirely trust that someone like Effie hasn't ordered this so we'll get slightly drunk and spill all our information. In fact, when the redheaded Avox girl comes over, I give it back to her surreptitiously while chatter takes over. Trying to get Tsubasa's is much harder, especially because he's actually drinking it.

Officially, I'm convinced Haymitch did this, because he asks, "Rin, were you in on this...alliance?"

Fiddling under my seat, I start by saying "Yeah..." but I'm interrupted by my fellow tribute, who must be intoxicated somewhat.

"Are you kidding?" He snorts. "The guy practically confessed his love to her during training. He held her all close and showed her archery techniques and stuff. But he was all apologetic afterwards. Then he probably was planning a makeout session for after the interviews that I destroyed."

An evil smile is apparent on Haymitch's face as he responds, "Oh? That's interesting..."

Suddenly, anger boils up inside of me. It's almost like a fire, left untamed. Rapidly, it goes from a small flame into a blaze, as I screech, "YEAH! And I also threw a sword at Copper because he was pissing me off with his superiority complex he was growing that he used on YOU Tsubasa! And I did a lot of other crazy shit during training," Now I sound more like pleading. "I'm telling you, Sirix just wanted to help!"

I then find my body being dragged by myself, escaping to the garden on the roof. Tsubasa tries to follow but I close the elevator doors before he can get in. Cold fury is expressed on my face as I watch him lay his hands on the glass that separated, hurt darkening his appearance, his hair all over and his tie still electrifying as I zoom up.

Curling up in a ball, I barely notice the drone of the elevator as it approaches the top. When the doors open at the top, I have to think hard about getting up and out of this elevator. After a few seconds, the doors try to close, so I jump out. I know exactly where the next stop on that elevator will be. I have no want or need to back there.

Slumping over to the bench, an unexpected soul is laying on the reinforcement, elbows sticking out as his hands hold up his head. Looking up at the sky, his legs go to the end of the long bench and the armrest is his footstool. His tie is looser and he's unbuttoned the first two buttons on his shirt. Stepping on something, I notice it's his shoes have been kicked off and he's barefoot. Now that he's in front of me, I notice he has some sort of gold makeup on that somehow works with his slightly tan skin. The gold accents that were on his jacket have dulled, and by the looks of it, so has his pride.

I stand, paralyzed, as our eyes are locked on each other. Lost, my lips feel like they're coated in sawdust as I struggle to find what to say. Surprised, he almost falls out of the bench trying to sit up straight.

"Well." Sirix croaks. "Funny seeing you here." He gets up, and stands up straight in front of me.

"This is for not telling me he was in love with you." He slaps me, hard on the face. It burns at first and then simmers down to a tingle. I say nothing.

"This is for ignoring me onstage." He slaps me again, harder, and when his hand comes in contact with my other cheek, the pain is hard and cold. Feeling tears welling up in my eyes, I stare at his chest.

"This is for angering me beyond control." Again, he slaps me, and the pain is blinding. All I feel is my flesh on fire.

"And finally, this." He tilts my head up and kisses me. While I am a bit shocked, I'm somewhat comforted in a way, so I push forwards. Laying his hands carefully on my face, the pain in my face dulls. His lips are smooth and gentle, and he acts as though I'll shatter into a million pieces if he pushes any more. A tear falls down both mine and his cheek, as we know this is so wrong in too many ways and if anyone found us, we'd be dead. Stroking his cheek to wipe his tear away, we both feel the fear of tomorrow together, but a wave of strength overcomes as he takes my hand off his face and clutches it tightly, with it, the life of each of us. I trace his arm with my finger tips, feeling the warmth of his skin on my icy hands.

"What was that for?" I ask.

"That was to show that I love you." He chokes out.

It's one of those confessions where you have no idea how to react. I feel my face go hot. " Why?" I throw my head into my hands. "You are so...perfect. Why does it seem so wrong if I can't decide?"

He just reminds me, "you don't have to."

"Eventually I have to! And don't forget I probably will not be coming back after this!" Yelling, I realize I'm hysterical. "I hate how I'm almost required to cause problems for people. Why can't I just keep a low profile for once?"

Brushing his lips to my forehead, he assures me, "I am just happy to have met you before death."

I stifle a sob, and manage a croaking noise instead. I can't imagine him dead, gone, forever. "I can't bear to live with you dead..." I bury my face in his shoulder.

But then I remember Tsubasa, so determined to make me a victor that he came to the games with me.

These two boys...while they may be very different, I see similarities between them. Of course I can't decide. They are both amazing.

When something glimmers in the sky, both our faces crank upwards.

"The stars!" He'e been following my eyes, and now the same facial expression I had as a child looking at the stars is on his face. Such genuine joy, the same joy I wish I coule have. "I love the stars."

I smile. I'm so hopelessly happy that I don't know what to do. "I love the stars too." I reply, as I cock my head up to admire the beauty.

A few minutes of this is all it seems we're allowed before I hear the familiar sound of high heels clicking. Effie! "Run!" I whisper. "If she finds me with you..."

I don't need to say anything more. He sneaks out and back to the elevator, and Effie comes to guide me back to floor twelve for our goodbyes to Haymitch and her.

Back on District 12's fine floor, we get a minute, since Haymitch spilled something and is attempting to clean it.

"How was your make out session with Sirix?" Tsubasa hisses.

The sensation of falling is what I feel now. So much so that I sit by a trashcan for a few minutes in case I vomit.

"What the hell are you talking abou...ou...oh cra-" I attempt to ask him, but I throw up midsentence from all the stress of today. I ignore the bile on my mouth and finish, "What the hell are you talking about?"

He hands me a napkin, so I wipe my lips. "Oh, I just figured, since you were all pissed at my stupidity of getting drunk and telling them." He has his hand on his face, covering his left eye. "I'm sorry, okay? Really. Please," He looks more disturbed. "I can't lose my only happiness now."

Crumpling the piece of paper in his hand, I feel helpless. While I have strong feelings for Tsubasa, I can't stop thinking about Sirix. What am I supposed to do?

Goodbyes are short and sweet. Effie mentions how she was "so proud to see me blossom into a fine woman". She adds how she might get a "decent" district next year.

My conversation with Haymitch is different. "What was her name?" I ask, searching for information on his dead love.

A pained expression overcomes his face as he answers, "Maysilee Donner."

Maysilee Donner! That was the original owner of the pin Madge gave me. I stroke the area where my mockingjay would be pinned on my shirt, only to find the smooth fabric of my dress. "I have her pin. It's my token from the mayor's daughter."

His eyes light up, but he then resumes his scowl. "Stay alive."

"I don't plan on getting killed." I raise my eyebrows.

He pats me on the back. "Good. Now go get some sleep."

Walking back to my suite, I feel the false sense of security as I open the door. _They can't hurt me until tomorrow. At least be ready for it._ But I'm wrong. Very wrong. They already have hurt me. They've sent me to fight my friends, given me a diseased sister to fight through it, and destroyed who I was.

Sleep is a joke tonight as I am an insomniac, tossing and turning every minute. What hell will I be thrown into tomorrow? Will I survive it?

Fear runs throuh my veins. A jittey feeling, similar to the one I feel when I was kissing him runs through my veins. Only now, it doesn't make me feel warm. Terror is more like it.

I manage an hour of sleep or so, before Cinna comes to escort me to the hovercraft. "Rin, wake up," he cooes as he taps my cheek with his soft fingertips. Making a noise I cannot describe, I get out of bed and follow him. Softly, we tread up to the roof, and a hovercraft is waiting. I climb one bar and I'm frozen-I can't move at all. When I arrive in the interior of the hovercraft, a woman in white clothing is ready with a syringe.

"Stand still." she sternly orders. I'm a statue? What does she mean? I can't utter a sarcastic remark at her, so I just stand there as I feel the stabbing pain of the needle. The tracker is in place, so I am free to move. Cinna is now up, so we go to breakfast.

Finding it hard to eat, I sip the water given to my heart's content. Might as well, since water is harder to find than food. The minutes speed by, and it's already time for us to go down to the stockyard-I mean the launch room. While the Districts nickname it the place animals are slaughtered, it's technically called the Launch Room.

This year's tribute outfit is simple-a pair of tauny pants, a forest-green shirt, a black belt. Cinna throws me a hooded jacket, coal black, that seems to be made of a material that reflects body heat. "It's probably going to be cold at night-keep that in mind." He murmurs. I nod.

Slipping on fingerless black gloves, I see they are padded with a material to reduce blistering from weapon use. What will these hands of mine do for the weeks to come? Will they even be in use anymore?

Cinna holds my hand as we wait for lauch. "Just follow Haymitch's advice" he says. Staring at the ground, I feel the warmth of his hands on my cold and clammy skin.

"LAUNCH TIME IS NOW. TRIBUTES MUST ENTER THEIR GLASS LAUNCH TUBES." A pleasant female voice calls us.

I shudder over to my tube and enter it, knowing my safe barrier I used to have is now gone. Cinna speaks to me, "I'm not allowed to bet. I know I'm not. I wish I could though, I'd bet on you."

"Really?" I ask. "Why?"

Cinna smiles. "You have the spirit and the skills of a victor. So go out there, and win. For me. Please?" I nod. "I will always be there for you."

The tube starts to rise.

Cinna says one last thing to me. "I believe in you."

There is darkness all around me. Then, a blinding light comes into my view as I'm lifted up without the casing around me.

I smell trees. As I look around, I see a small grassy area surrounded by trees and a lake. We're in a forest. Long past the lake, I see a wheat field. One would have to travel far to get there. I smell the pine trees, just like at home, but I also see maples and oaks. The Cornicoupia is in the middle, glistening in the light, and supplies are strewn about.

I flinch a little, and I am beyond surprise. In the middle of the supplies directly in the horn, I see a cedar brown violin case. The same case from when I played for the Gamemakers.

The Gamemakers have given me a violin.

* * *

**Question for the critiques: WHO SHOULD RIN CHOOSE AT THIS POINT IN THE STORY? (I'll be asking this from time to time to see if your opinion changes.) PLEASE TELL ME HONESTLY. **

**Now is the fun part for me, because action and romance mixed is my high point. I'm good at action and developing characters, so definitely you'll meet some more new characters/tributes. PART II IS STARTING!**

**SO CRITIQUE**

**PLEASE**

**CRITIQUE**

**PLEASE**

**PLEASE**

**PLEASE**

**OKAY ALSO NEXT CHAPTER YOU'LL GET A SNEAK PEEK AT THE NOVEL I'M WRITING**

**now go read isabugg's stories while waiting.**

**BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE**


	10. old 10

**OKAY YOU HAVE ALL THE REASONS IN THE WORLD TO HATE ME.**

**BUT SCHOOL IS TAKING UP MY LIFE. **

**AND I'M TUMBLR ADDICTED. (my user is girlwiththebooks)**

**SO GUYS BEAR WITH ME.**

**ALSO, THIS CHAPTER WAS DIFFICULT BECAUSE THE ACTION IS MINIMAL.**

**But also, don't kill me, but I might only publish one chapter a month from now on. Actually, let's be positive and make it one chapter every 3 weeks. Because some weeks I have all the time in the world and some (like the last 4) I HAVE NO TIME.**

**But anyways, without further ado, HERE IS THE BEGINNING OF PART 2!**

**(also please review please please please please please please please review. Reviews are actually what I look at when I need inspiration to write)**

PART II: The Fights

10

The first thought that comes to my head is Haymitch's advice. _"The Gamemakers are unpredictable."_ Unpredictable, it's such a perfect word for them. Any synonyms wouldn't be as precise on the mark.

As I analyze his advice, I find a double meaning in it: he gamemakers are incredibly predictable. They have a show to put on. I can give them one, and the violin will only add more action. I can already hear the confused voices of the commentators who are speculating what an instrument is doing here in the arena. I have to retrieve it-if I don't, I know for a fact the Careers will destroy it, and if they do that, a little piece of me will die.

_Tick, tick, tick._ The clock is running. Only 45 seconds are left for me to organize my thoughts. I stare at the grassy plain and breathe slowly, trying desperately to calm my body. A thought pops into my head to stop soothing myself; I know it's right because my nerves are going to strengthen my muscles. I can run faster if my body is in alert mode.

The woods look piney. In terms of shelter, it's not the greatest, but I see in the small hills far away, more familiar willows and maples.

Over here though, it's a mixture of dirt and tufts of grass. A large lake reflects the shimmering horn in it's water. I will have to find a water source, but this one is off-limits. Careers usually camp out by the Cornicoupia.

The horn, which is spilling over with items, gleams in the sun. I notice there are items strewn around, their value going down the farther they are from the Horn. Inside the Cornicoupia is filled with weapons, backpacks, tent packs, food crates, first-aid kits, and more. The Careers control these supplies once the bloodbath is over. They control everything.

To my right is a smirking Copper, and to my left, a small girl from District 11. I observe the Cornucopia, a study of gold that represents the horns that we fill in November. It's bursting open with supplies, all which would be invaluable to the tributes. I see on the left side a bronze bow and a sheath of gold arrows lies on a crate of apples. My head jerks over to the middle of the male side, and I see Sirix's eyes trained on it. But, I also see the girl from District 4, who is much closer to it, has noticed his preference to the weapon. She narrows her eyes, and a sly smile crosses her face.

I notice the supplies placed around the horn. For instance, an empty water bottle is near my plate, but I'm sure if you fought through the bloodbath, you could get a gallon size, filled bottle. Or, I could run 20 feet and retrieve a backpack containing almost anything, only to find a container of water in it.

But on the right side of the horn, a silvery blade with a leather handle sits on a first-aid kid. It's Tsubasa's sword. I look over and see a scowl on his face. He's going to go in for it. It does worry me that he is venturing into the bloodbath, but...

My brain alerts me that it's time to get ready. My muscles are in place, ready for action. My heart pounds in my chest like a drum.

For a second, it feels like the whole world is silent. Then, the gong sounds.

I sprint into the horn. I am one of the first to arrive. Snatching the case up, it's unexpectedly light. As I get ready to run, I strap it onto my back. A glint of metal catches my eyes. Above my violin is a pile of knives-I need a knife, badly. I contemplate jumping up and grabbing one, but the sharp sound of an arrow whizzing by wakes me from my dream. Of course I can't get one, I need to get the hell out of here, or I'll be dead. Taking the arrow, I turn back around to find a way out of here.

Sprinting back the way I came, I hear the chain of a mace and the sound of knives and arrows hitting targets, and screams from tributes behind me.

"What? You're not joining the party Miss Electricity?" Copper sneers from yards away to me. "The Careers would be glad to have you!"

"Like I would join you," I grab the water bottle near my plate and take a single look back at the Cornucopia before running full speed for the woods.

As I dissect the image, I remember seeing Tsubasa with his sword and the first-aid kit that it rested on, headed in the direction of the woods to the right of me. Sirix had retrieved a blue backpack and a loaf of bread, but he seemed to have dissapointment shown on his face as he couldn't retrieve the bow. That irritating District 4 girl shot an arrow that landed a few feet away from him, and he was reaching for it.

In the forest, I see plenty of feet away between the trees a small figure jump for a parachute while running. She holds a coil of wire and sprints while she open it. Inside is a pair of glasses- it's Mayu! Her mentor must have thought up that clever plan; _Ignore the Cornicopia and I'll send you glasses in a parachute._ I'm sort of glad. She needed sees me, and dissapears into a clump of pines.

After a while, I slow down to a run, and then a jog. Even that pace I can't keep up, so I walk, panting ftom exaustion. My muscles are sore, and I want to rest; I can't though, I have to make distance between the Cornicoupia and me.

Rumbling from my stomach alerts me that I need nutrition. I would use the age-old trick of eating the inner bark of pine trees, since I'm starving, but I have nothing to saw through the outer, hard bark. So I travel on, and make it a goal to find water.

It's nice, being in the woods, in the fresh air. It's nice being alone for once. Well, relatively alone. I'm probably being featured as walk, every once in a while, to tell gamblers and watchers that I am alive and well. There are so many deaths that anyone alive and away from the action isn't really important.

Rustling in the bushes causes me to hide behind a tree, but it's only a pack of rabbits. I still wait for them to be out of my vision. They could be muttations, looking for kills. Shuddering, I hope that we won't be viewed as a food source.

But, if there are animals around here, there must be water close by. A hint of giddiness runs through me before I remember where I am. I trek on.

Looking at the sky, I would guess it's somewhere around 5:00 in the afternoon. Seven hours have come and gone, but I still have staying power. By tonight, I must find water.

The cannons start to go off. I stop, leaning on a tree. My breaths are heavy. The staccato of cannons pierce the air, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine times. Nine dead. Fifteen left to play. Overwhelmed by the large number, I assure myself that the careers will have a few more dead. It won't be just me killing them off.

My stomach churns at a new thought: what if Sirix or Tsubasa are dead? Already been taken by hovercraft to be cleaned up and boxed away, back to District 6 or 12. They were still at the horn when I took off, and let's not forget Sirix was weaponless. Any Career could face him and he'd have little cance of survival. Tsubasa actually would have a good chance of fighting and winning. He's probably deep in the forest now.

Dead. Sirix could be dead. It only makes it worse when I try to imagine who his killer would be. Copper? Shine? Calvia? The District 4 girl with the light brown hair? District 2's male with the bemused expressions?

I throw the idea from my mind-he's too smart to get killed this early.

I only have an hour until dusk, so I start searching harder. I wonder what Haymitch would say to me now-give up the search and rest or keep moving forward. I decide to rest.

I pick a large oak as my support, climbing high enough to see a 1 mile radius, and not be seen. Luckily, my violin case is a similar color as the wood.

I belt myself onto the tree and attempt to sleep. Thinking, I wonder if either of the guys are looking for me. That'll be tomorrow's goal; I have to find them, or at least one of them. Hopefully, they both have a weapon and food. My stomach gurgles, and I snap "Haymitch, a little help here, please?"

Sure enough, a parachute falls, but only a packet of crackers is my gift. The problem is, the crackers are loaded with salt, so Haymitch knows if I eat one, I'll have to find water, and that's exactly what he wants me to do.

"That was sure helpful..." I mutter sarcastically. I stuff them in a pocket on my jacket.

Distantly, I hear the pounding of feet far off. It grows closer, and I grab my arrow, ready to throw it down at the enemy.

A girl with metallic red curls is sprinting for her life. She's unarmed. Quickly, she passes, but then I hear a metal chain. Copper comes faster, with a spiked mace in his hand. He is making speed on her. Cracking of a branch comes, and I realize that the girl has tripped and fell. A bloodcurdling scream pierces the air from her.

"Want to say goodbye to the camera?" Copper cackles as she squirms violently as he pins her down.

"Please, no! I'll join the Careers, I'll do anything!" She pleads to him.

"Can you even use a weapon well?" He asks, just to humor her so he can murder her.

"Uh...knives, I can throw them!" She blubbers. "I won't be much trouble!"

"Hm. But we'd still have to kill you later so I suggest we get it over with now." He pulls up his mace while speaking, and the girl screams. Her voice is harsh on my ears, and I feel pain from the sound, like someone is scratching my skin.

The chain clinks, the spiked ball hitting her head, and it's that quick. She's dead.

Sharply, a cannon fires.

Copper runs off into the woods in the opposite direction of my tree. After waiting a few minutes, I slip out of the tree and tread silently over to the girl. Blood drips from holes in her head as she retains her emotionless expression. She looks so repulsive I almost vomit, epsecially since he destroyed one of her eyes and it is now liquid. She has a ripped backpack, so that has no use to me. I don't think there is anything worth taking until I find a small packet of dried fruit in the inner pocket. Finally, I have food for once.

At once, all the birds stop singing. My immediate response is to run and start scaling that oak tree I was in again. Halfway up, I hear a mockingjay in a tree near the dead tribute girl give a single note-a high D. It's a warning call, I can tell, because a hovercraft floats high above about a hundred feet away and takes the tribute girl.

In an instant, the hovercraft dissapears, and the birds start to sing again.

I tear open the dried fruit package and start eating. The pain in my stomach lessens. Apples and oranges are in the packet, but occasionally I see a grape.

As I eat, night falls in the arena. An occasional hoot or howl will come from the animals in the forest. We are going to have natural predators hunting our rabbits and birds.

Soon enough, the Captiol seal comes on in the sky, and the anthem plays. The seal erases itself, and we see who died today, tribute by tribute, in district order.

We only see headshots, not replays of the death like viewers at home would, mostly because if for example, Tsubasa killed someone with his sword, everyone would know his secret weapon. So we only see faces, some smiling, others not. The district number also is shown.

First to be shown is the male from District 5. That means everyone from 1 through 4 survived. That's not uncommon. Then, his tribute partner is shown as well.

If Sirix is dead, he'll be next. My heart pounds. Is he next?

No it's the guy from District 7. Thank god.

So Sirix is alive, and knowing him, he's looking for me. I need to find him tomorrow.

Both of District 8 and 9's tributes are dead. The girl I saw get killed was from District 9.

The girl from District 10. The boy from District 11. Is the last one his tribute partner or Tsubasa?

It's the girl from District 11. I'm not that surprised though, I expected Tsubasa to survive. The Capitol seal is back with a flourish of sound.

The sky goes black.

They're alive. Relief flushes into my veins and my heart pace slows down from it's rush. They'll be looking for me tomorrow though, and I need to find water.

I decide to allow myself 1 hour to find water. If no sources are located by then, I'll wait until morning.

Soundlessly slipping out of my tree, I shuffle around for a while, trying to be as silent as a stone. Cool air flows onto my neck, chilling me to the bone. I put my hood up, and run through the wind. Not knowing which direction to go, I trust my instincts.

Wildlife calls to each other and birds flutter their wings to fly. I notice many are going in a certain direction, so I follow.

I hear water rushing; I can't contain myself and I start running. Sure enough, a clear stream lies in front of me. Before I start to gulp water madly, I remember I need to purify it. Cursing under my breath, I decide I will drink later, when Haymitch can waste more sponsor money on me.

As I slump back to my shelter, I feel my muscles' weakness and I have to constantly remind myself tomorrow everything will be better. I climb up, back by my violin. I decide sleep is the best thing I can do, so I strap myself back into the branch.

Just before I fall asleep, I hear footsteps, and my whole body panics. It sounds like one person who's used to hunting. I hope to god it's not a Career. Soon, I hear them climbing the tree I'm in. I almost pass out; I don't have the guts to look at my soon-to-be-murderer. They only climb a few stories up and then they stop. I'm almost hyperventilating by now.

A familiar voice mischeviously asks, "Are you going to sit up here for the whole Hunger Games?"

A glowing smile. Bronze hair. Blue eyes. Sirix.

**AN: SO HOW DID YOU LIKE THAT? REVIEW THIS AND TELL ME!**

**So yeah.**

**ALSO IF ANY OF YOU HAVE SEEN ISABUGG, PLEASE TELL ME. SHE'S SCARILY INACTIVE AND I'M FREAKING OUT.**

**But anyways, PLEASE REVIEW. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! As I said above, they help me want to write.**

**So now, at the end, I'll keep a death count so you're informed(m=male f=female, and the number is the district #):**

**m5**

**f5**

**m7**

**m8 **

**f8**

**m9**

**f9**

**f10**

**m11**

**f11**

**NEXT TIME: the gamemakers add some fun, and another tribute is dead!**


	11. old 11

**OKAY SO I'M ALIVE DON'T WORRY**

**CHAPTER 12 IS COMING SUPER SOON.**

**MY WRITERS BLOCK IS OVER**

**THIS CHAPTER IS AWESOME**

**SORRY TO GOD IT'S SO LATE**

**REVIEW PLEASE**

11

_Sirix._

The name rolls off my tongue with ease. I have to repeat it in my head until I comprehend that it's him. Reaching out my hand tentatively, I study his face, like I have so many times, only this time seems different. It seems more like I'm in a dream, like this is all fake. "It's you..."

A mischevious grin is grown on his face as he claims, "You had no idea I was coming, didn't you?" The heat from his body reaches me through the chilling air, cracking the layer of cold I sense on my hands

"You're…you're not here to…kill me…right?" My voice trembles as I fight the chatter in my mouth.

He rolls his eyes at me and grins. "Because obviously after the last week of training, talking," his voice hushes to barely a sound, "and the last night of kissing," he regains his voice, now at above normal tone, "I'm here to slit your throat."

"Oh shut up. This is the Hunger Games, you can't trust anyone." I remind him. I drop my voice to a whisper, so no can pick it up but him. "Especially not devilishly handsome District 6 boys who use arrows. Those are the least trustable kind." I shoot him a playful smile and back up.

Just imagine how annoyed the Captiolites are, how they can't hear our conversations. The thought pleases me, so I smile in the direction of the tree bark. A camera is surely there; trees are perfect hiding spots for cameras.

Sirix hoists himself onto my branch. "So." He beams at me. "I've got a backpack full of mystery, and you have…?"

"An arrow and…um…a violin." Blushing a rosy red, my eyes look around.

Sirix only raises an eybrow. "Well, in my backpack of mystery holds," he opens up the zippered part and digs his hand in there, "a pair of probably fire-resistant gloves, iodine and a water container, a coil of wire, and a few packs of dried fruit."

"Oh, I also have a pack of extra salty crackers, courtesy of our mentor." I mention.

"Well, I found that stream over there. I'll go get some water and we'll sip pleasantly." He says, mimicking the Capitol accent.

"That would be fantastic." I reply similarly.

Creaking of branches is the extent of what I hear when Sirix leaves with the water container, iodine, and arrow. Fatigue sets in, so once he's out of sight, my eyes shut.

* * *

A cannon wakes me abruptly from my slumber. _Oh god, oh god,_ I think to myself. _He's gone off and gotten himself killed_. But I hear running, and see Sirix climbing up the tree like mad.

Dawn has come and gone, and it is mid-morning now. Carefully, I sit up, but pain in my abdomen causes me to collapse again. "Are you...are you coming up here?" My voice is hoarse from dehydration, so I look downwards at him. He nods, and keeps scaling the tree.

"Get a pack of dried fruit out. We'll feast on that and your crackers." He mentions.

"Water," I croak. Sirix chuckles as he hoists himself onto the branch; once on, he hands me the water container. The minute my lips touch the damp opening, my mouth feels a cooling sensation. I gulp a mouthful first, then another after a moment, and on and on until I leave the container three quarters empty. Sirix however, is putting everything back in its place.

"Who do you think it was?" He murmurs. It can't be a career. It's too early for them to be dying. Plus, they have a pyramid of supplies for them. Someone minor, like the girl from District 7 might be out. I can't imagine Tsubasa is out. He's too smart, too much of a survivor, and he has a weapon of choice. There's no way he went down without at fight. Unless…

I can't think about that now. I'll worry myself sick. "We'll find out tonight."

"I know you're worried about him," he says. "I'll make sure we find him soon." He pushes my face into his shoulder. "Relax. Today we'll just stay up here. Maybe we can gather berries or something for dinner, as long as the gamemakers don't have anything planned. They probably don't, because there was a fight this morning."

He has a point. They can't exactly hurt us today because there was enough action already. Hopefully, they'll give us a rest.

_The gamemakers are unpredictable._

Its late afternoon when we decide to go gathering, the same time I'd go for a run at Twelve and find some animal for dinner. Humidity in the air is strange, but I realize it means it rained before we arrived here.

There was one day a few months ago when it poured outside, so everyone was confined to their homes. Of course, my family needed food, so we broke into our tesserae grain to make some bread. When I heard sharp pounding on the front door, I tentatively opened it, only to see a familiar drenched friend standing in the rain. He had a gigantic grin on his face and held a rabbit in his hand. "I had to make sure you guys had something to eat" he remarked. I must have looked hilarious, because he laughed loudly when I stared at the meat.

"Aren't you cold out there?" I asked. He was wearing a long sleeved shirt and pants, but not a coat or anything. His hair was drenched, but it had dried a hint in the time it was standing there. "You want to come in?"

"Maybe, for a minute." Stepping into the warmth and light of our house, he shook some water off and looked around. I took the rabbit, placed it in the kitchen with mom, and came back. "So what are you doing here? Pondering life? Boring yourself to death?"

"What do you want me to do?" I snapped, jokingly.

"Come." He said, and he pulled me out, into the rain. Against our house was his sword-he placed it there for the time being. Grabbing the weapon, he led me to the fence that separated the forest from the district. A break in the wire is the perfect place for us to jump over and experience freedom. I started to run with him, into the great unknown of the trees.

"What are we doing?" I didn't know what was going on.

"I, your best friend, am teaching you how to have some fun." Stopping right by a large apple tree, he started to climb it, and I followed.

* * *

Sirix finds a patch of berries for us to snack on. After I make sure they're not poisonous, we nibble on a few slowly. "We've been hanging on pretty well," he remarks.

I laugh. "It's only been around two days."

"Well, there's still a lot of tributes dead already." He reminds me.

"We're never going to get anywhere if we don't get a weapon soon, though."

"We'll get one. Don't worry."

"But when, is the question. The careers could burst through here and kill us and we'd have nothing to fight back with!"

"First we have to find Tsubasa, and then we look at the prospects of getting weapons."

I sigh. "I just worry about us. We can't exactly hide up in a tree for the whole games." He grins, as I remembered what he told me.

"Well, we're at least picking berries now. Soon we'll be less evasive."

The birds tweet, the wind rustles leaves in the trees, and the world is fairly serene. It's awful that this is what our hell looks like. It's not some blood drenched forest with no end. It's serene as our home forests.

"What's that noise?" Sirix asks.

I listen hard, using all the power within me to sense what's around me. The mockingjays fall silent and the wind slows. Buzzing is what I hear, in the distance, far away. It rattles my bones as it comes closer.

Bees.

Wasps.

No, these are tracker jackers. The muttations of the capitol, created for the rebellion, to create fear. When you're stung, there are harsher mental side effects than physical. Usually, people can only tolerate a few stings.

"Tracker Jackers!" I scream, forcing myself upwards. "Run!" Grabbing our supplies in one hand, and his wrist in the other, we sprint as fast as possible. The trackers are making speed on us though.

The Gamemakers want more out of us—specifically more out of me. I haven't been giving them a good show, and now they're showing me I have to, or I'll end up getting killed. They're engineering the wasps to chase me; they're egging me on to find a way to get out of the hive's reach and keep Sirix and me safe. Sure as hell, I'll be giving them a good show.

My muscles are starting to ache. Never have I kept full speed this long. Up ahead though, I see a figure, a human; I assume it's a male. Closely cropped black hair, extremely tall—it's only when he looks back that I notice it's the boy from District 3.

I don't remember anything about him except when he did not laugh in his interview at a joke Caesar made. He was stoic throughout the whole thing. He is now picking up speed, as is the trackers. I have to think. Hard. Quickly, it hits me. I yell to Sirix "When I say go, you jump to the left, and I jump to the right." I have to pant between words; I'm running out of steam. He is nodding. I hear behind me the obnoxious hum of the trackers. At the last second, I will scream, and the bees will all lunge forward and sting the District 3 boy.

It kills me a little inside to know that it will mean his demise.

Soon, the trackers will be at my neck, and it will be over. I wait for the perfect moment.

Three. Now the trackers are raging, about to meet us, their victims.

Two. The District 3 tribute isn't running as fast. He's getting closer to us and the bees.

One. There's a moment where everything is still.

"Go!" I screech.

Sirix and I soar to the sides. Expecting the hard earth, it's a pleasant surprise to feel brushy leaves around me. Unfortunately, three tracker jackers found me, so a painful sting in my leg, arm and collarbone comes. Ripping out the stingers, I feel putrid goo exploding on my hands as the gold trackers detonate in my hands. My thoughts seem to fly away as I study the liquid gel emptily. Suddenly, I remember Sirix and the boy and I jump up. Sirix is already running towards me. He has a small sting on his arm. "Rin!" The world seems swirly. "Rin! Are you okay?" Sirix is chasing me.

I walk over to the boy from District 3. About fifty trackers have mutilated his face, arms, and legs. Swelling up to five times their normal size, I notice a coil of wire and a battery compartment attached. _He was going to sneak up and electrocute tributes like us._ It's a good strategy, but this ruined him.

These games ruin us all.

Ringing is in my ears. I feel dizzy. The trees around me are turning to a gray stone, the birds' songs turn to screaming of people I know. I think I hear a guy I know, asking me if I'm alright. Maybe. Maybe I'm dying. Someone else is screaming along with the birds. I think it might be me. Oh well. The boy next to me has perfectly bronze hair. I think his name is…Sirix. I think I like him. He's asking me what's wrong, why I'm screaming.

I'm now running. The ground has turned to quicksand. Trees turn to dust. I fall down, hit my head on a bush, and pull myself to a pile of the same goo that came out of the trackers.

The last thing I see is a pair of blue eyes staring into mine. Then the nightmares begin.

* * *

For a strange, unknown reason, my memories come back. But, that's the least of my worries. The first nightmare tricks me into thinking I'm awake.

I'm standing on the cournicoupia. Next to me is Tsubasa. He's bleeding, yet he's telling me, "It's okay. I want to die; it'll save you." I'm paralyzed and cannot do anything about it.

"No, NO!" I scream for the life of me. "You can't die,"

"But you can't get out of this hell unless I die. Please, I want to save you." He reassures me.

Before I can yell for him to stop, he's already gone, and I'm falling down into another place. I'm running through the training center, and it's so chilling inside, my hair stands on its end. The mirrors reflect back, and I see I'm wearing a nightgown that hems at mid-thigh. Wondering what fear I will face, I notice Sirix walks in. He's wearing a thin, short-sleeved, white shirt and gym pants. He smiles sexily; then his body morphs into Tsubasa's. Now he walks over and smells my hair-it feels nice to have someone I can trust so well in these nightmares. Then, he's kissing my neck and my heart races faster than I ran away from the bees. Every cell in my body is turning on as I feel his lips touching my body. He breaks away and takes his thin shirt off, revealing lean yet toned muscles. Eventually starts to kiss me, and everything I sense seems right. If only this wasn't a dream.

When he breaks away, "Tsubasa" turns into Copper, his thin figure gaining muscular weight and growing a few inches in height. He's ramming me against the wall. He tries to pull off my nightgown and I scream in pure terror. "Let's go all the way, miss electric," he says seductively, and I kick his knees, his foot, and I scrape his shins.

Everything goes black when he smiles into my soul, telling me I'm a goner.

Now I see Livia. Or at least, I see her corpse. She's dead, she died, and we're at her funeral. Whenever I see a picture of her, I feel guilt and regret for leaving. When people reassure me it's not my fault, someone says, "Didn't you know? Her sickness devoured her."

The darkness blinks for an instant, and then I'm at Tsubasa's funeral.

It was Copper who killed him, and I let him die on top of the cornucopia.

Darkness ensues.

**DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO SO NOW I LEAVE YOU WITH NO IDEA OF WHAT HAPPENS**

**NEXT WEEK SOMETHING AWESOME HAPPENS.**

**AAAAAWWWWWEEEESSSOOMMME.**

**SO REVIEW**

**PLEASE REVIEW PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE**

**I'll update with a death list soon, probably on the next chapter because it's a spoiler who that cannon was for earlier.**

**LOVE YOU SEE YOU REALLY SOON**

**(i've been given new thunder now with new fans on tumblr)**


	12. old 12

**SWEET HOLY MOTHER THIS IS LATE**

**NOT EVEN GOING TO LIE I AM THE WORST PERSON TO YOU GUYS.**

**I CAN FEEL THE VIRTUAL STABS COMING RIGHT NOW**

**So, I'm trying a new thing where I have NO date on when to finish chapter 13, or 14 for that matter. I have absolutely no deadline.**

**and guess what?**

**I'm already half done with it (I was going to publish this yesterday).**

**So apparently, that method works, so I'm going to stick with it.**

**So ENOUGH OF MY BLABBERING LET'S GET TO THE STORY**

* * *

12

Darkness seems to never end.

It's like a plague, a storm, an eternal torture. It grasps me and hurts me in ways I never thought possible. I need light.

But, finding light after fear destroys you is difficult.

In the distance, I see a glowing opening in the sea of black around me. Reaching for it, I find myself engulfed in the radiance, until I can barely see myself.

* * *

When I wake, my eyes open abruptly. The light drifts towards me, blinding me temporarily. My vision comes back, and I realize I do not know where I am. A rock ceiling is above my head; when I tilt my head, I become conscious that I am in a small cave. A noise passes my lips, something between a moan and a sound of confusion. Slowly, I blink a few times.

I hear a hunter's tread, coming closer to me. "You're alive," I hear a voice remark. It's familiar. Turning onto my other side, a tall figure kneels before me. I blink a few times, and my brain reconnects.

"Where are we, Sirix?" The words pass through my clogged up throat, only to be thrown from my lips. I gag, cough, and bark until my throat is clean of all congestion. Sighing, I sink all my weight back into the ground, which is freezing and provides no comfort.

"Calm down. We're in a small cave near the stream." He reassures me we're safe.

"How did I…"

"After you were stung, it was pretty bad. You were screaming like a lunatic until the venom starting infiltrating you deeper. I stashed everything in my pack, swung it over my back and carried you as you shook like a leaf. I only heard the cannon for the District 3 boy, so I assumed you were still alive, and right I was. While I carried you, I looked for a place for us to rest and found this cave." He explains.

"You carried me the whole way here?" I'm stunned.

"Well, it was nothing. I can't imagine what the poison is like." He blushes a little, but I remember-he was stung too. I take off his jacket and see a bump with dried green pus around it. Of course; he carried me while fighting through the tracker jacker venom.

"Sirix, you know what it's like. And yet you still worried more about me than you." I huff. "You can be a little selfish you know. It's not like I've ever done anything for you."

He puts his lips right next to my ear and mumbles, "You lived. You fought. That's enough."

It's these kind of comments that drive me crazy. While I feel content for a second, I remember a certain guy I should be looking for...who would say the same thing to me. Sirix doesn't owe me a single coin, and yet he's still looking out for me. But, I have a nagging suspicion that Tsubasa already found me, but doesn't want to disturb us. Meaning that he thinks we have more chemistry than him and me. That, in and of itself, is the most selfless thing I've seen done, yet I feel a pounding guilt from it.

"I've gotta go...uhm...you know." Stumbling over my words, I stagger out and walk to the stream. Taking my jacket off, I notice my stings are barely a bump anymore. He healed them while I was asleep. Aggravated even more so, I plunge my face into the sparkling water. The refreshing qualities are nice, and when I whip my head out for air, the wind invigorates me. Footsteps, as always, are in the distance, so I climb up a large willow-the most concealing tree there is-and sit, as I see Mayu tread through. She holds a knife and does a double take when I rustle a few leaves. She flees into the distance.

Strange.

I feel so alone. The arena has turned into a desolate battlefield for me. I already have Tsubasa to save, and I now realize it's necessary for me to save Sirix. They can fight it out when I'm dead and gone. Maybe the Capitolites already know about Sirix and I; maybe I am creating the greatest clash in the Hunger Games' history-the two lovers of a dead girl, still wrestling for her. Everything about that makes me feel awful inside.

I can only imagine all hell will break loose when I'm killed. Copper will run to find my two allies left, if it wasn't him who killed me. Sirix will lose his cool when I'm murdered, most likely taking his rage out on someone else. Tsubasa won't be able to go on. He'll commit suicide, or he'll slay everyone and then execute himself, leaving no one to be a victor.

My only hope is that I can stay alive until the very end, when only one of my allies are left, and then kill myself. They'd have a victor, indeed, but it will be someone worthy. While I cringe at the thought of one of them being dead already, I know in the end only one of us is getting out. I've known since day one, and I planned to sacrifice myself to save Tsubasa...and now, I'll save Sirix too, if I can.

This thought runs through my head for a long time. Half and hour or so passes before I'm snapped out of my cavern of the mind. I hear limping footsteps. First, a light touch of the brush underneath, and then a trample with the other foot, as sticks break beneath. Moaning comes, quietly from the tribute approaching, and then the hobbling begins again. By the time the body is right under the tree I'm in, I have slid down a few branches, to see who's coming.

Now, I feel I'm in a surreal dream, as a boy with ink-black hair and eyes as grey as the sky above me leans into the tree. He coughs a few times and slips down to the bottom of the tree, resting his back on the bark. The strange thing is how he uses his right hand to hold the left side of his abdomen. His opposite hand grips his sword tightly, like a lifeline. He has a matching jacket like mine, all black, that is he has half off. It's weird, there's something about the way he's holding his side that makes me suspicious something's up.

Swiftly, I find a way down, and stop on the last branch. "Tsu-" I start, before he yelps and looks up. Our eyes meet, and everything is washed away. Sweeping my legs over, I push myself off the tree limb and fall to the brush. He looks at me, and then starts to speak.

"Rin. You're alive." Tears almost wet the corners of his eyes, and he moves closer to me.

I brush a piece of hair out of his eyes, and bring my hand around his cheek. "Yes. And so are you." Our emotions are the same-relief beyond words. Finding him is as if I found water in a desert, food in a famine. He leans in, and I'm expecting a kiss when he instead moves to my ear and says under his breath, "You and Sirix have much more chemistry you know. So I won't force a kiss out of you. I don't want to be a pest who chases after you-you're free to love whoever. I only want to see you happy, and if that means letting you go, I'm okay with that."

Just as I expected. He must have found out somehow. But a nagging instinct in my soul tells me that I do love him, much more than a friend. I want to kiss him, to put feel his soul protecting me and I have wanted to for a long time. I may feel close to the same way with Sirix, but at this moment, right here, he'll never measure up to the altruism Tsubasa has just shown.

I lean right in, and press my lips to his. The odd thing is, he pushes back, and picks up my hand that I rested on my leg. Soon, the world is gone, and all that matters is Tsubasa. He's alive, his warm lips are touching mine, and his body is right next to mine. My hand reaches for him, for his comfort, and it bumps against his side accidentally.

"Dammit!" He screams as he quickly breaks away. Perplexed, I ask, "What did I do?"

Curling up into a ball, he pants between as he says unconvincingly, "Nothing, nothing don't worry about it." He's cursing under his breath all the swear words I know, so I know it isn't 'nothing'.

"I saw you were holding it." I raise my eyebrows. "Don't lie to me-what's going on?"

He sighs, and slowly pushes himself up. "District Four...Elias...he came. I was minding my own business when he jumped out. We fought...for a long time. His sword was larger, much clunkier, and he managed to graze my side. I battled it out with him and eventually...I...killed him. My sword...it went through his chest. I washed it off in the stream and hobbled around for a day or two." He cringes again. "And now you found me."

"You got that first-aid kit at the cornucopia, right?" I ask. He nods. "Well get it out, I've got to make sure it's not infected or anything."

"Sure you want to try to heal it? It's pretty nasty." Grinning, he rummages through a tiny bag that just fits the cream colored box. Opening it, I find what I hope I need—bandages, anti-biotic ointment, and pain medication. I take a deep breath, and brace myself for the worst as I zip off his jacket and pull up the shirt underneath up to where his hand was, not daring to look at his face, abdomen, or anything but the very side of his body.

The cut is somewhat gruesome, as blood is dried and dripping down the side of his body. I see the part of his pants that is under it is a deep red, drenched in the scarlet substance. A fair amount of pus is leaches out of the gash. Swallowing, I open the tube of ointment and slather it while I hold his shirt up.

While he can't stifle a few cries of pain, he's being a relatively helpful patient. My hand is covered in the waxy cream that supposedly will help heal him. My right hand feels behind me for the bandages. Once I reach a reel of rough bind, I wrap it twice around to make sure it stays. Dropping his shirt so it returns to covering him, I run to the stream quickly and wash my hands.

At the stream, I see Sirix off in the distance, looking around meticulously. _Oh god. _I think. _He's looking for me._ Yet, I don't dare to go stop him. I walk back in the other direction, but it turns into a jog.

When I return, I find Tsubasa biting his lip hard. "Does it sting?" I ask.

"A little." He cringes. "Okay, more like a ton."

"I've got pain meds, if you want to take them."

He nods, and takes the blue pills down to the stream. As I wait for him to come back, I count how many mockingjays I hear. I sing a short melody to them, and they catch on quick, repeating it with harmonious voices bouncing around each other.

For a moment, I think the rustling of a bush is a threat, but when I see it's just him, I relax.

"Okay, that should help." He says, sitting down next to me. "So, I was thinking about how lucky I was to get out of the cornucopia alive when I realized something: do you notice how the order of the tributes around the supplies changes each year? I realized that they always have it in a half-circle, and at the middle, they put two very promising contenders. This year it was you and Copper. Did you notice that? They consider you a very likely victor."

"Only because they think you're going to die for me, which I won't let you." I recall my strategizing just this morning, and how I will make sure I live until the end and then meet my demise, and his victory.

"Then I'll do everything in my power to make you win." He kisses me gently and quickly. A different type of hunger comes over me, one that doesn't wish for food, but for another thing- another kiss, for him to hold me in his arms, and maybe something else. I'm not sure though, it's a strange, foreign feeling that I've only ever felt on a small scale; I've never experienced it at such a massive size.

Eventually, we both sense the same feeling among us, and he reaches out to touch my cheeks. I grab his hand and pull it towards me. _What am I doing?_ I think. But, I sense in my bones that I should, so I do. He pushes me up against a tree and as soon as I know it, his lips are on my neck, just like in my dream. My heart though, beats faster than I felt in my nightmare, as it's real. My insides seem to melt; yet they sharpen. As he caresses my face with his hand, I place my fingers on the very back of his neck. I seamlessly transition him to my lips, but I find he's shaking a little. I try to ease him down by gripping his hand harder, but he quickly breaks off and holds his forehead.

Stuffing his fist in his mouth, he bites down, hard, as he yells into his fist. He takes out his hand and says "It's not about you Rin, it's the pain. It's getting worse."

These damn gamemakers. They gave him pain pills...pills that make the pain worse. I swear if I do win, Seneca Crane is the first person I will strangle. Now Tsubasa is curled up in a ball again, restraining his wails of pain. I slam my head into my palm, and snap at Haymitch, "Are you going to just sit there drinking your heart out while he suffers?"

Nothing comes though. Not for another twenty minutes, when a miniscule vial of medicine comes from a sliver parachute, I assume is cheap pain medicine. Coaxing Tsubasa up, we slowly walk-well, he's more limping-over to the cave. He eventually stops and leans by a tree, so I decide to give him the medicine now, rather than wait until we're back at the cave. Sure, it may have been stupid in the first place not to give him the medicine right then and there, but I want it to last for as long as possible.

When we arrive near the cave, I brace myself for the inevitable—Sirix's confusion, my explanation, and a wave of awkwardness around us. So I creep in slowly, trying to draw little attention to myself.

As I expect, Sirix is sitting inside, looking hopeless. He flinches when I come in, and eases himself down right after. But, when Tsubasa follows me, he screeches.

"Oh, sorry. Sorry, I-are you...what?" Unlike his usual self, he stumbles over his words in a deluge of confusion.

"Hey." Tsubasa grunts. "She found me hobbling loudly." He points at me and slips his other hand in his jacket pocket. A cough or two is all the noise I hear for a long time. Both guys look at me for a while and after a while Sirix gives me a subtle nod

"Um...I should probably go hunting for, uh, dinner. Can I use your…" I drift off.

"Yeah." Tsubasa barely grins. I take the sleek handle—freezing cold metal, like the ones in the Training Center—and go on my way.

The forest is teeming with life right now. Rabbits rustle bushes, unnatural birds rest on tree branches, and small animals scamper around. I stay completely still—not moving an inch—until one settles into its place. Just as I remember Tsubasa doing, I attack the animal with the sword and kill it.

It turns out to be a rabbit, which is perfect over coals. I hang it on the bag and walk a while more, trying to give the two boys privacy, but I can't help it. I need to know what they're talking about.

As I pace around, I decide to sit on a log—I'm physically too tired to climb a tree. Funny enough, my mind is alert and rested, but my body is exhausted. I manage to find such a place so I can tell what is going around me. I try not to let my senses down, but I start to feel stupid after the fifth time of whipping my head around only to find a frog jump out of a bush.

But, I can tell when I hear careful steps of a fellow tribute approaching. Slowly and carefully, she draws near. I leap up; thrash my head around to find a girl my age a knife throw away. Taking my sword up, I threaten her by placing it so it would hit her heart in an instant.

"What do you want?" I say, sternly. "If you don't want an alliance, I'll have to kill you."

Her eyes narrow; she picks up her makeshift knife. "You stole my boyfriend. Now you'll die."

* * *

**ANNNNNNNND CUT**

**now you must wait for chapter 13**

**I'm going to go work on it now.**

**So, _REVIEW AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER_**

**Death list:**

**m3**

**m4**

**m5**

**f5**

**m7**

**m8**

**f8**

**m9**

**f9**

**f10**

**m11**

**f11**

**(as you can see, there are a lot of guys dead. it's time for some girls to get the axe LOLOLOLOLOLOL EVIL WRITER THOUGHTS)**

**See you next chapter lovelies!**


	13. old 13

**And here! In a little bit over three weeks, is chapter thirteen. This is the beginning of the catalyst for a small plot arc in the arena. Next chapter is going to be awesome.**

**REVIEW PEOPLE.**

**Okay I'm going to write Fourteen now.**

13

I have absolutely no idea who the girl in front of me is. Her hair hangs down in greasy strands, parted down the middle. Sadly, I realize I probably don't look much better, because when you're in the hunger games, you don't really put bathing as a first on your list of priorities.

Her eyes are a boring brown, similar to her muddy hair color. Creepy enough, her skin is so pale, she looks like a ghost, coming down to kill me and take my soul. "What are you talking about?" I tilt my head and peer forward, utterly confused. She must have gone crazy from the stress of the games. Every year or so there's a tribute who goes insane, and the capitol can never explain it.

Growling, she screeches, "Sirix? Remember him? Your little slut face was slobbering all over him the night before the games? ON THE ROOF?"

Shoot.

Shoot.

Shoot.

"Why can't you go to your own boy? I mean, he's cute right? And he's in love with you." She continues. "I had Sirix first you kno-"

In a split second, I lunge forward, jump on top of her, take her knife, and put it at her throat. "Any other parts of my life you'd like to tell the world about before you die?" She's stunned. I acted fast, and she's dumbfounded.

"Sirix!" She screams. It's almost hilarious how much of a show she's putting on. Somewhere in the back of my mind though, I worry that he'll come. Of course, now she's called the entire arena for my death. Damn it.

In that split second, she wiggles a little bit out of my grasp, now screaming like a lunatic. Pondering how to kill her humanely, I figure stabbing her in the heart will kill her quick enough that she won't feel the pain.

Why am I trying to be ethical to this girl? It's the Hunger Games! I have to give the audience a show. Playing with the knife in my hand, I trace her eyelids with the knife, and a trail of blood comes behind. I should feel safe, but I feel like a bloodthirsty killer.

Giving her a gash on both arms and her legs, I jump up and sprint away. If she's smart enough, she'll know how to heal the wounds and survive. If not...well, that's not my problem. I hear her moan and can imagine the blood coming out of her. I can't understand my guilt for trying to kill her. I barely know her!

But, then again, she barely knew me.

The connection I have created with Sirix is very, very uncommon. We're designed to not care about anyone, only to care about our survival. They want us to be selfish creatures that are hardly human. Just think of the careers- they've been turned into killing machines, taught to not worry about anything but victory.

That's my dilemma. I can't stop thinking how that girl has a family, friends, everyone rooting for her. She's afraid of death. She wants allies. She needs a sign of humanity. I mean, needed.

Just. Like. Me.

Dizziness comes over me, and I can't really understand why. Stumbling around, I go in the direction of the cave. They must be done talking. I know I'm done thinking about this girl.

It's painful to think about her, especially since I pretty much killed her. One swipe from a weapon will kill her easily, if she doesn't die of blood loss. Her eyes haunt me, still, as I walk around. I've lost all sense of direction, that's for sure.

_Get yourself together. You're not going to win with an attitude like that._

I figure a wash in the stream wouldn't hurt. Haymitch can tell; a bar of soap flies down. I'm a little uncomfortable with stripping in front of the entire country, so when I crouch down next to the flowing water, I leave my underclothes on, and I stuff my arm under them to wash the skin. Carefully placing my supplies, including the knife and sword, I sit in the water for a while, and I then lather my body down. I give my hair a good wash or two, remembering the girl's rat-nest hair. Luckily, the soap's designed to clean it too.

When I finish my cleaning, I sit on the ground where the sun hits me perfectly, drying myself off quicker. I'm a little damp, but I feel less dirty than I was.

I put on the rest of my clothes carefully, savoring each moment. When I finish, I sheath the knife in the special pocket built into my belt. Swinging the backpack over my shoulder, I hold on to the sword with a firm grasp.

I'm done kidding myself. I've got to go back and talk to them. Jogging back to the cave, I realize I'm physically exhausted, completely. I might fall into the mud at any moment.

As I pace myself, I notice I really do look a lot better. While it's a little superficial, I can see my hair shining as nice as it did in the Capitol. I had no blood on my hands when I washed.

When will my hands be caked in the liquid?

I make myself stand straighter, and I move myself back to the cave. Sirix is laughing and Tsubasa is smiling. The two look...gleeful. Strange, as I have no idea why they seemingly ignored the screams from afar.

"What's going on? Why are you two laughing?"

Sirix pants between chuckles, and sputters out, "You don't think I'd know the difference between Mina and you?"

I'm completely lost. Who is Mina?

"Mina. My tribute partner. She's kind of a bitch, if you didn't notice. A pathological liar too. I hate her guts, and of course she comes after me all the time. Before we got in the arena, she tried to get a cameraman to 'catch' us making out in the hallway behind the stage. She insists we're in love and I don't know it yet. I heard her screaming my name an hour ago or so."

"She kept insisting she was your boyfriend and she wanted to kill me. I gave her some gashes and left." Sliding down the cave wall next to Tsubasa, I smile. "Um, Sirix? We need to talk. She said some stuff that…oh shoot, I forgot." I rip the rabbit from my belt. "I got us dinner."

Before I can finish saying 'dinner', Tsubasa rips it out of my hand and grins. "I'll go cook us _lunch_." He's gone before I can assure him I would do it.

Sirix's demeanor changes. He looks slightly worried. "What did Maxima say?"

"She…she caught us on the roof the night before the games. She called me a slut. I have a feeling she's not too inaccurate." I mutter.

"So…the audien—"

"They know." We're both talking quiet enough that no microphone would ever pick it up.

"We'll survive. You'll survive. You'll win" He says, louder. Kissing my cheek, he walks off. I make a real effort to look surprised. Since we talked about how the girl was a pathological liar, they probably think the roof part was a lie. If I can keep it up, I'll clean up my image. "Oh! I like the new knife. Can I use it to hunt down Mina? I don't want to kill, but she's taking things and warping them." It's not entirely a lie. Technically, she did warp many things. Just not the part about the roof.

The part I wish she warped.

I toss it gently towards him. He catches it perfectly and goes on his way.

Collapsing in the corner, I ponder my image to Panem, and sadly, it doesn't look very clean. I killed a boy, injured a girl, kissed two guys, and made enemies with a career. But, to the Capitol, I must be on fire.

Fire.

Something in my mind connects the Careers and fire in my head, and I imagine putting their supplies up in flames. It seems just like a useless dream, something that would never happen.

As I daydream, I fall asleep, for real.

Tsubasa wakes me, maybe, an hour later, and I'm completely startled, so much that I scream.

"Whoa, easy there." He reassures me. "It's just me, your friend of who knows how long." His comment makes me smile and laugh a little.

"Everything going okay?" I ask. "No one's dead yet?"

"Well, Maxima is dead. The cannon fired, and Sirix is out finding greens for dinner. I have a coal-cooked rabbit for us to share. Unfortunately, Mina's crappy knife broke during the combat between Sirix and her, so we're stuck with my sword for a while." He leans down and kisses me quickly. "We'll be fine, though."

My grin returns, and I feel real euphoria.

"Oh! Also, I retrieved your violin from that tree. Figured it shouldn't sit there all the games." When I go to sit up, he doesn't move, conveniently making it that my nose touches his. All it takes is a simple tilt of his head and his lips are on mine. I end up lying back down, but so does he. We roll a little so we're both on our sides, and I link my arms around his waist as he caresses my hair and places his hand on my back. He tastes of the fresh forest air and a buttery flavor I can't put my finger on it.

For a second, I break away. "You snuck tastes of the rabbit."

When he smiles, I can tell he's guilty. Without answering, we go back to our lips being pressed together. I put my lips on his cheek, and then his ear, and then his neck. His skin still tastes of home, and I feel the warmth that he's had forever. His finger barely touches my chin, and we fit back together.

He makes me forget that I'm in a fight to the death.

I slide my hands around his back and reach under his shirt to his back, my freezing hands feasting on the warmth he gives off. My only thoughts are about him, and how I want him.

One false move though, bumps his ribcage, right where his cut is. In an instant, he breaks off and out of my arms; he screams into his fist.

That's when I remember we're fighting to the death.

As he curses and yells, I rummage through the supplies and find the first aid kit. I roll up his shirt just enough to expose the cut. Undoing the bandage, I slather the cream on and hopelessly try to reassure him everything is okay.

After I add new bandages, I give him the last half of the vial of pain medicine Haymitch left us. He calms down and starts apologizing.

"Everything was so perfect, and my damn injury got in the way. You were so…"

"It's not your fault. At least you haven't gotten blood poisoning, since I found you so early. You'll be fine. In a few days, it'll be much, much better."

Sighing, he nods. "You made me feel so perfect though. I felt like something had gone right."

I attempt to smile. "It's okay. We'll have plenty more times to be together." It's difficult remembering how I'll have to leave him eventually. Eventually, I'll have to die.

Wordlessly, I decide to open the case. Inside is that same violin, of course, but in the small compartment I find a box of matches. The Gamemakers made it easy to destroy it, if necessary. There's nothing else in there.

I close the case and sit back next to Tsubasa. Resting my head on his shoulder, I can see him beam out of the corner of my eye. "We'll eat soon."

Sure enough, Sirix walks back in, berries in hand. As I examine the berries, the two guys divide up servings onto large leaves, our plates. The berries are extremely safe—I remember the exact kind in the training center. I portion them out to all of us, and we eat.

Sirix is the first to start conversation, saying, "Hey, Mina today tried to make out with me. It was funny as hell. It was like she was drunk or something."

"Did she say anything about me?"

"Oh sure, just how you gave her the cuts and stuff and how you're a bitch and other stuff. She wanted to ally with me or whatever. I just laughed."

The conversation is too awkward. He seems to be dancing around the fact that he _killed _her. While I try to find a topic, I remember my thought before I fell asleep, and everything seems to connect.

Fire. The careers. The matches in my case. Sirix's fireproof gloves. The brush I fell into during the tracker jacker attack.

The pieces of the plan fit together perfectly, like a puzzle.

"So, this may be completely crazy, but I think I know a way to destroy the Careers' supplies." I blurt out.

Both of them look at me like I'm insane.

"When did destroying the supplies fit into our plan?" Sirix is perplexed at my sudden outburst.

"I'm not sure, but listen-if we destroy the supplies, they've never learned how to fend for themselves. They only know how to kill, not feed them. If we take the weapons and destroy the rest, they're screwed." I explain.

"And how do you suggest we go about doing this?" He doesn't look convinced.

"You have fireproof gloves, I have matches. There's the brush on the ground. We can light little balls of brush and chuck them at the supplies. Since there are most likely lighters in the boxes they've been using as fire starters, those will ignite, and possibly there might be some explosive chemicals. We can destroy it all. It'll only take a few fireballs to set it all ablaze. The metal _might_ melt, and then there will be nothing left for them." I try to break down the process enough so it seems reachable.

"They watch their supplies like hawks. They're not going to just leave it there to get stolen." Tsubasa reminds me. "They'd notice us, and we don't have the weapons to fight them."

I completely forgot that. It's my only hole in my plan. There are options though.

"We should set fires in different places around the arena. The smoke in the sky will make them want to go get victims. Their weakness is how bloodthirsty they are. I can set the fires while you two get the weapons and destroy the rest."

Sirix frowns. "No, you'll get killed. You won't have a weapon yourself. We need to either stay together, or-"

"I'm not a weak little girl! I can handle this." I snap.

"I never said you were!"

"You said I'd get myself killed!"

"If someone like Copper comes behind you, you're dead. He said so himself, you're his most wanted."

"I'm not going to just sit next to the fires! I'd run to the next one!"

Fighting with Sirix feels wrong. We're usually so harmonious; it feels like the tension is rising out of nowhere. I don't know why it offended me so much that he thought I'd get killed. He was just looking out for me-yet, it did sort of hurt. Does everyone think I just hide behind these two guys for protection?

"I can set the fires. You two are a bit more agile than I am, so you can snag the weapons and blow the rest of the supplies up quickly." Tsubasa offers. "Where should we meet afterwards? And what can we use as a distress call?"

"Afterwards, just come back to the cave here. In terms of distress, sing the mockingjays this." I whistle two minor notes, and outside, the birds call them back and forth around the arena. "If someone whistles this," I sing four dissonant notes, "Reply with the first call or this," I sing the two notes from the beginning, only in a major key this time. "It's all a game of call and response with the birds. If you're being attacked or anything, screaming out our names is sort of more effective."

"So tomorrow, we'll do this." Sirix confirms. "It feels awesome to finally be getting back at them." He smiles. "I'll take first watch tonight. You two should get sleep."

"Don't watch forever. You need sleep for tomorrow." I warn.

"Sure, sure, sure. You two get sleep." He waves Tsubasa and I away. We clean up the leaves from dinner and crawl to the back of the cave. I lean up against his shoulder.

"Tomorrow, you'll be the girl who played with fire." He looks amused.

"So will you." I remind him.

"The tributes that played with fire. I like it. Hear that Cinna? Portia? Electricity isn't the only thing that comes from coal." Looking upwards, he seems to be talking to our stylists from the arena. I laugh and say, "There's ideas for next year's costumes!"

Somewhat for the audience, I kiss him and say, "You're a genius, you know."

Staring at me, he says, "You're the one who thought of the fire thing. _You're_ the genius." His lips touch my forehead. "Now go to sleep, fire girl."

While I do sleep for a while, I wake up in the night to take the watch. "Go to sleep, Sirix." I tell him, since he's fighting to stay awake.

As I watch, a parachute flies down, and in it, is a fancy, sleek lighter, just like the ones the Capitolites have. At first, I'm confused why Haymitch would send me something like that, when we have matches.

I find a hidden message in the gift:

_Tsubasa was right. You'll play with fire. But here, to the audience, you are on fire._

* * *

**This is one of the first chapters that I'm completely happy with how it turned out. There are some minor edits I have to get to, but it's pretty awesome in the end.**

**Death list:**

**m3**

**m4**

**m5**

**f5**

**f6**

**m7**

**m8**

**f8**

**m9**

**f9**

**f10**

**m11**

**f11**

**I feel like if I add any more commentary, It'll influence your opinion. SO PLEASE REVIEW **

**DID YOU REVIEW YET**

**REVIEW IT PLEASE**

**Onto fourteen!**

_(also, you might want to follow .com for special beta reads, and updates on how things are going! Just saying_


	14. message for all who made it here

legitimately, how the hell did you get through that?

it's going to be different when I edit it, just saying. and that was a load of completely horsecrap. I wrote that during my 8th grade "sensitive writer" phase

it's horrid. i know it's horrid. but please, stick with me. I promise the rewrites will be better. no weird "haha tricked you two into liking each other" and no "oh mah gerd i had no idea he liked me" and no "hee hee we're kissing oh man make room for jesus" or whatever.

it's going to be made real. it's going to to hurt. no glamorized violence, no violin. hell, Rin might even almost die. wait what did i spoil a cliffhanger-

so please, don't judge a fanfic by it's old chapters. Terrence is more sarcastic, more fun than Tsubasa. Rina "Rin" is more fun than emo moody Rin from 2011. Sirix is more aggressive, full of rage. (I mean, shit, he's been picked to die, and I wrote him like he's attending an awkward "meet other kids from Panem!1!")

stick with me, folks. it'll get good.


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